Dance your ass off!!!

By the beach...

2009-08-23T07:15:00.000-07:00

It has been a while tht i have yet to blog about anything... Sorry my friends... have been busy with work.. Went to church activities with Aloysius n his church frens... managed to capture some shots tht shows the real time tht we are really relaxing..:) by the beach...

A green hulk behind me... xiao pang.. haha.

slipper gang!

My new friend, Amanda.:)

Wahahaha... look like couple right? keke..

By the beach.. I'm trying nt to laugh... lol.

God answers...:)

2009-08-09T12:49:00.000-07:00

Well... it's been quite some time since the last posted blog... I came to realised that seriously, online friends are not dependable.. they might just come n go.. cos you dunno them well enough.. n there seems to be a barrier, whereby you wont understand about their backgound, as they didn't share it with you... everything seems like a mystery... In the previous blog post, i mentioned him. Yet, I still felt a gap. A gap that you will never be able to fill up. Because of the platform of knowing each other, communication channels, differences, n many many... Yes, Benjamin can be a great friend. He still does contact me. Just tht lately i'm so nt in the mood, cos of work stress... cant be really bothered to answer him about my work... its nt tht i dislike him. Its just about the mood, n the tandem of understanding. I'm sorry. You are still a great friend. I think i am too emotional, that I mistook you as tht someone to be.

Had given myself some time of being alone. I spoke to God. I need to receive from Him. I have been busy all the time in Yishun Christian Church. After these few years, I think I did commit through my services. Dance, choir, Sunday School. But I lacked input. Couldnt find a right time n location for my input. I need a quiet time for myself to get close to God n learn his teachings. Finally, Aloysius brought me to his church nearby my place. It was a young church as compared to my own church. The thought of going there to receive gives my heart a smile. I love the people there. I felt tht they really love each other even though their church is small. It's a bilingual church. N their fellowship gives me motivation. With Aloysius by my side, I have more confidence of being part of them, a family that shares love amongst one another. I never felt lonely. Everyday is full of surprises, hope n joy. I love God. Every moment tht He has made for me are precious. I will continue to pray. Will also pray for Aloysius to heal, n I hope to witness his water baptism soon. You can be better.:) Dun be afraid of S_ _ _ _. Thank you Aloysius..:)

Emotions

2009-07-24T11:17:00.000-07:00

Lately, I realised that work has been piling up..some changes happened without any signals... lots of calling, sending of letters, rebates... I'm trying so hard to reach a Tier 1. My first offer to the customer has lapsed, what a big blow to me. Why cant the customer promise me to make his payment on time? He can help himself n as well as helping me get a job well done. But, these are just empty promises... I managed to Hit! benchmark for my Contacts, still a little bit to go for KPs and $Collected... I have to Hit! this month... I have to... I felt the tension, stress level going up to the tip of my temples, especially when someone who comes in later than me but has more working experience than me had Hit! a Tier 1. I want to push myself to be better. Had been quiet lately in the office... I dint "tiew" so much like I usually do to my colleagues. Even Phoebe asked what happen to me...

Partially is because of my own personal problems too. I cried to Huiqi tonight. I told her how much I needed someone to be there to walk with me. I'm not thinking about having bfs. Its just about a companionship, someone to be there to lend me a ear and care for me. I missed my parents, how have they been? I got stressed at work, who can I talk to? I need someone who will love n care for me, someone who will tell me, "yes, i'm here to care for you." I started to realise his goodness, all the part n parcels that you almost cant see them. These part n parcels may seem easy, but they contain care n sincerity. I dont care how he looks, how good or bad his family is.. I needed a someone just like him. Yes, he told me, "i'm here to care for you..". Yes, he is. I felt his care showered on me. He is tactful. He is gentle. A peaceful natured guy. He dont like quarrels n he never scolded me though tht I am unreasonable at times. He gave me a Carebear. It shows that he cares. But he left for holiday without letting me know in advance. At the last minute of time before his flight, he smsed me n said, "i'm flying off soon, u must take care ok?" Early in the morning when I was on my way to office, the sms soured my heart. My day in the office was crushed. I didn'nt have the spirits to do my job, and I just kept quiet... Its just silence that accompanied me with my feelings... What will the outcome of us to be? I'm tired... I just want to close my eyes and think of his care... Its a breakdown.. Truly it is.

Another meet out with my darlings...

2009-07-03T09:08:00.001-07:00

We went to Andersen's Ice Cream n had this 5 scoops Classic something... share ok... ha... thank god we din order tiramisu or rum n raisin.. lol. someone might get drunk.. lol.

Borrowed my Secretary's shades. isnt it cool tgt with my new hair style?? hehehe...

Babie having her cooling ice kachang... always like to advertise things she likes hahaha...

Hmm.. they somehow look alike in some ways.. i jus cant tell what is it.. but for all of us, i'm sure we bring lotsa laughters.. :)

See you soon again my darlings..:)

Getting pale, need a coffee break!

2009-06-30T08:40:00.001-07:00

Realised that I have been getting pale lately.. I look so tired in the eyes.. Thank God that "Secretary" tompang me again n we headed down to Compass Point for a chill out at Starbucks, a place where we could have our "meeting" haha.. "meeting" with the yum yum waffles n ice blended coffee.. :) Reward myself n a pat on the back for a job well done after one month at Citi..:) Jiayou.. n thanks for accompanying me "Secretary"...:)

"Too Nice" pictures

2009-06-11T07:45:00.000-07:00

its a formal one. thank you NYP...

Nad's cuzzie said we jumped well.. n mine is graceful ahaha...

Graduation Pictures...

2009-06-04T07:38:00.001-07:00

Perhaps this will be the last photo with them...

We are trying to show the poses... :)

Not yet ready!!!

Another "NG" shot.. haha.. we had a great time...

More to come! :)

Babies babies!!! Stay healthy too...

2009-06-03T06:20:00.000-07:00

Work has been getting more stressful each day. Been eating alot.. lots of "unhealthy" food hahaha... so for my dinner, i should focus on having more dietary fibre instead of carbohydrates... :)

This is Hua En. :)

This is Shi Xi. "Salute!" :)

This is Xin Yu. :)

More Graduation Pics...

2009-05-30T11:55:00.000-07:00

So chio... The Diploma Holders...

Come, give us a kiss too?... lol.

25 May 2009, Monday

2009-05-28T07:14:00.000-07:00

Finally... after these 3 years of hardship... I'm officially graduated!!! :)

(with Oatmeal Raisin and Cinnamon cookies from Claris)

During the early morning, I was waiting happily in the graduation queue... M10 was my number, waited so long.... the robe is really BIG!

And this is US, the Caramels Unite! All graduated! Congratulations to one another!

(more pics to come soon)

Oohh... I like this! Dearie Sheena took this. I will miss u Sheena! :)

My Lover, Claris attended our graduation..:) She is so happy for us.. I can see from her face hahaha... Me and her went to eat dim sum after graduation, and she promised that she will date me after her exams and she will buy me this sticker too! hahaha... being with Claris always brighten my day!

"We" love to kiss each other... lol.

I love the food. Not oily... Very hearty! yum yum!!!

This woman, always so busy, always making "big business"... haha...

"Pro-Claris" play pool like as if she's rushing for a plane! And she deliberate lose to me for my fortunate "lao ya" skills...

More work to come! :) I was wanted by another Supervisor from another department today. Will be going there on 1 June 09, most probably. Started doing live calls in office... So far so good... and I'm starting to love my workplace!!!

It has really been a wonderful 3 months (going 4 months) with Benjamin! He has been busy, but he never neglect me whenever I need him. He has been such a nice fren to me. We agreed to meet on June for exchange of gifts for our months anni. haha... His boss has extended his attachment period. He must have performed tremendously well! Jiayou in yr work ok!

I thank God for everything!

This Week.

2009-05-22T08:01:00.000-07:00

Been busy with trainings, had coffee and staring at "numerous numbers" hahaha... stress... relief myself as i took a bus after work. along the way i took a picture of my favourite designed building, Stamford House... look at the contrast of the orange lights, delicate prints and lines on the pillars and the structure of the windows above... isn't it beautiful? :)

Met Veron, Joanne, Melinda, Clement and TK on Wednesday night after work. Went to Jacq's newly "Aloha" Western Stall to try out her new stuff... not bad, quite worth it and ingredients are thoughtful.. yummy... :p This is the "damn nice" cookie-based chocolate cake that Joanne had got at Plaza Singapura for everyone, especially for our dearest Veron who is going back to Philippines... :( will only see Veron next year... I will miss Veron! :(

Been a week.. and everything has been going well... I wonder how is Babie? My Secretary lei? Miss watching "Chip & Dale" 's missing in action ahaha... Oh a random stuff to tok about.. I realised there are 3 carebears in my office level! (I counted them! lol)... Hmm... I want a carebear for my own office table too...and a cushion, a mug, office slippers, teabags, coffee mix, cookies, mints...mini radio? hmm... and i wanna pictures of fuancake, jas, caramels to stick everywhere around my office table!!! hahaha.... In this way I sure will do my job well hahaha... peeps.. pls contribute some of yr beautiful pics to me ok? lol. (serious.) er, April said, "i want blanket!" hahaha... wad about mattress and bed frame?!?! lol....

Happy weekend!

Coffee Addictions...

2009-05-21T10:14:00.000-07:00

WOW... I can't really believe that I'm so into coffee nowadays... especially in the mornings while sitting in the office hahaha... buay tahan lei... felt my eye lids so heavy like curtains closing the window... and i slept for 2 whole evenings in this week after i had my dinners... not exaggerating lo... it's really true ok? ... perhaps a slight coffee influence by Mr. Trevor hahaha... Friday's coming! Dress-down teehee... look forward to weekend! Training tomolo! Keep on moving... ... I need COFFEE!~

Stage of life...

2009-05-19T06:17:00.000-07:00

It's been the second day of my new job..:) Done quite alot of training with my nice trainer, and many other friendly colleagues of my new hire batch... The tests that our trainer gave us made me reflected about the show in Hallmark Channel's "The Biggest Loser". We were given many set of notes to read up and will be tested on 3 papers on the next day. All are expected to pass and the passing benchmark is 80% of each paper. Those that fall below that 80% in any of the papers, out you go! This is real true! Two of my colleagues(temps) were sent out of the building as they failed to attempt that 80%. I thank God that I passed all the 3 papers, 90%, almost to full marks! This made me felt that the demands that the company wants are really high and critical... I start to feel the stress level and expectations that they want- almost to perfection. Not kidding... 3 more papers to go on next Thursday. God please help me!! I want to stay!!!

Times have passed so quickly. Peter tagged me a photo of DanzInc. ... I'm so missing dancing... all the good memories and wonderful performances that we have been through together...:) And I realised that everyone of us has grown up... In different stage of life, we will go through different commitments... Dancing was, and is my passion... I never let my passion for dance to die off, neither will I wanna forgo my career... they are so important to me... Without them, life will be meaningless... They are not a chore, but they are a good experience for me to improve and be better...:)

DanzInc. of Yr 2006 @ Bishan Park Performance

God's Miracle...

2009-05-15T11:02:00.000-07:00

I was browsing through facebook and realised Sister Vanessa and Brother Jimmy's 2 month-old baby boy, Issac. Isn't he cute? omg.. I kept smiling when I see this cute little smile of his. Thank God for creating such cute and adorable baby!!!

He got the face shape of his father, and the lips of his mother. He got his pose. Feel like touching his little cheek!!!

I want a baby like this!

Time to get more office wear...

2009-05-12T06:24:00.000-07:00

Been quite busy this week, settling stuffs to prepare for Citibank. Made my way down to create my employment account & medical checkup. Went back to school with Daddy to collect my graduation robe... can't wait for this day to come! :) Went dinner and soya ice cream with Daddy. And Daddy bought me a new pair of office slippers too...:) thank you Daddy! I realised I have been running about to different places... It's really tiring tho. Daddy bought me this pair of slippers as a gift to congrats me for my new job coming. :)

Went to see Mummy at her workplace. Dint know that she has stopped her work in the market. But she works for a poultry supplier, and she hurt her right hand. She is bandaged. :( Why is Mummy so stubborn? Mummy, can you get a better job that wont be so hard on you? Maybe a cashier at the NTUC? Mummy doesnt listen and I'm really worried for her... :(

Today, went to the orientation at Citibank EARLY in the morning. I went out even earlier than my bro-in-law, he is so surprised! "Wah, Amei go to work so early ah?" haha.. haven work lah... hiring date will be 18 May 2009, Monday. Get to know a new colleague from my department, her name is Ying Zi (Shadow) hehe... She is a nice girl. Went shopping with her after the orientation and chatted over the combination of Subway cookies and MacDonald's hot tea.. hehe...:) Got so fond of this office dress, but you know? It is more than a hundred dollars! So, this is what I do loh... no ownership of it, but had a picture as a memor.. hahaha...

Outing with the girls!

2009-05-09T11:29:00.001-07:00

An abnormal candid shot. We r trying hard not to see the "camera woman".

Had a great time with the girls on the Friday night... Had a simple dinner at Sakura @ FarEast Plaza... did some catch-up with them on their part-time jobs (for Chip&Dale), dance (for Babie), and holidays (for Secretary).. Did share with them about my coming new job at Citibank.. I'm so looking forward to it. Finally I felt a sense of ahievement that I got this job, kinda like a prestige.. "Banker" hahaha... when I'm rich next time, I will go to that stupid restaurant with my colleagues or friends or bf and throw money at the stupid Indian manager.. Sucker. lol.

Going for another health check on Monday and going back to school to collect my graduation robe. Daddy will be accompanying me. I love you Daddy...:)

A new job... :) Congrats Angeline!

2009-05-07T02:28:00.000-07:00

I finally got a call from Citi this morning... they are offering me the job!!! and the pay is even better... hmm.. not very nice to reveal the pay here.. but anyway, i'm glad that they gave me the opportunity to work there... and hopefully i can learn alot in this good citi culture..:) have to turn ttsh down... it was kinda last minute thing to let them know cos i have already signed the employment letter, and perhaps i have to compensate abit on the health check fees that i had on Mon... it's alright la... i believe that Citi brings me to a better worker, cos afterall, i'm still in the business sector..:)

Had a night of thinking last night with a bit of sobbing... whatever it is.. i shall not dwell on it.. why make myself miserable? To all my friends, i care for u... but to those that feels that I did nothing, n feels that i stress u n make you difficult, I have nothing else to say.. perhaps, we just couldnt sail on the same ship in tandem... overall, what i wanna say is.. if i really dun care or concern, i might as well just forget u and nv even had the tot of sms or calling you, jus like what you did to me... i know i sound rather mean this time, but there is nothing much for me to feel apologetic... i'm trying hard to show care, yet it seem not enough. then that's it.

Hee... so looking forward to meet all the girls tml! All will be turning up! yes!

i dun care for you...

2009-05-06T09:14:00.000-07:00

these few days i cant reach you... i was thinking you have been busy... i tried contacting you yet no replies... i care for you but you dun feel it... why do u say that? do u know i feel hurt? not even a minimum care u felt from me? i din do my part... yes, i din't...

These few days.. ...

2009-05-05T10:16:00.001-07:00

Today... happy shopping for shoes and belts and bag with my secretary, Nadia Norman Chloe Wella, and having her "tompang-ing" me the whole day on her red vespa... so cool n fun! i love rides!! :)

our "twin" belt... fri ah babe? lol.

my new shoes... cant believe it? both pairs only cost me $20!!! but my sister commented, "are u going to be a nurse?!" wth.

thanks for the "hot & cool" ride babe!!!

These few days has been rather busy.. but i believe i have made it fruitful and worthwhile...:) Busy catching up with friends and preparing for the new job coming... kinda neglected josiah for a while... i wonder where has he been again... perhaps should meet him play pool again very soon, hao ma? :)

Saturday: Been at home making belated bd card for jasmine and the little farewell cards for my colleagues at dan ryans. then off to work to deliver the little cards to my colleagues.

Sunday: Went for church music choir practice and sunday school. then met jasmine for dinner and give her the bd card and the "bd cake" hat that i bought for her at IKEA. hope she likes it. went to her house again to visit little baby elvis..:)

Monday: Went to ttsh to sign my employment letter and health check. swine flu is really quite scary!!! Met HuiQi at lunch too..:) met daddy, kor kor and sis-in-law for dinner and stayed at kor kor's new house... :)

kor kor's big big mirror with me in the cute cute pyjamas!!!

"my best frens"

"papa bear, mama bear and baby bear" lol.

dinner with daddy, kor kor and sis-in-law. I love that swing!!!

omg! swine flu is really tht scary? everyone in the hospital has to wear a mask. including me. had my health check.. god, i failed my eye test... gotta get a new specs soon before i can start work...

little namecards for my darlings in dan ryans!!!

little msg for jasmine...

pop-up bd cake for jasmine...

little bee and flower for jasmine too.. all handmade ok... :)

That's all folks for now... more stuffs to come!! Steamboat with joanne n gp soon, and gathering with caramels on Fri evening!!!

A new stage of life!

2009-05-02T12:35:00.000-07:00

Graduating soon on 25 May 2005... planning to further studies in a year or two... money is the concern factor. No money, no study... Friends have been asking me to take up loans. But I already have loans for polytechnic school fees, how am I going to add on my debt burden? Work first work first...

Found a full time job... will be working for an orthopaedic doctor.. not going to be a nurse but will be doing more of the admin side... God bless me... thought i will not get a full time job so soon cos i am a fresh graduate with no full time working experience...jus like wad joanna said.. "you really got to offer 1/10 of what you earn to the church.." hmmm... 1/10... hahaha.. i stopped for a while... i know men can be greedy.. but what i really thought of is to save it up for uni and pay off my poly debts, as well as paying my sis some money for giving me a place to live for the past few months... and perhaps, buy some clothings for my little brother, David. hmm... planning some savings for marriage? I believe it is a good start to plan for this long-term commitment.. :) try lah huh? lol...

Gave my resignation letter to Carol just now. will be ending my last day at the restaurant on 11 May 2009. Yipee!!! No more tortures from the unprofessional manager (thou shall not mention names), no more sad stuffs to think about (thou shall not think about the past), no more greasy hands and see people eat but u cant eat (that feeling is tormenting lah hahah).. HAHAHA.. i'm going to see how they die there... cos' we have alot quitted, quitting, and wanting to quit... blame the management for being so evil to the employers! Good luck!!! I believe my new job gives me a much more better pay than that restaurant... and i think it is really an honour to work with a doctor of the hospital, isnt it???

Random- I scald my fingers at work today... sob sob...

Hmm... i'm missing my kids at the sunday school! Laoshi miss you!!! time flies, another week passed... will see the kids tml at church!! I love Jesus!!!

I cried...

2009-04-26T06:42:00.000-07:00

It was my first time to cry on the streets... because I could not go home... I felt tired, lost, alone, penniless, helpless, hopeless...

Had been some time that the restaurant is "unbusy". But, Saturday itself proved it wrong. It was full house, and my colleagues and me did not have a proper time to even have a sip of water from the kitchen. Customers kept coming in, and we busy like hell, serving, taking orders, clearing, closing checks, setting new tables one after another. I have never felt so busy in the restaurant before for the past 6 months. And this night I was even made to stay longer hours to work. Supposedly I should end at 10pm. Due to the busy night, I was made to do OT. I ended at 11.30pm.

I rushed with Veron to the MRT station. No problems for Veron cos she can take a bus. But it's a BIG BIG problem for me. I missed my last train. God! I missed it! I don't have money with me except my EZ-link card. The only cash I had is the $2.30 that my customer tipped me that night. I cant afford to take a cab home. 2 days back I took a cab home, it cost me a bomb and there goes my salary for working one night. I didn't know what to do. I decided to sms Josiah for help. But no response during my most desperate time. It's already 12midnight and I'm trapped at Orchard Road, no train, no bus... no money... no one by my side... I tried to calm down, but I cant think of any ways to get myself home. Sister called me, she didn't offer to sent me home even though she has a car. Perhaps she is tired from work and she is already at home, and perhaps she think that it is my own responsibility to go home by myself. Yes, indeed, she asked to to find a way to go home by myself. I hung up the phone and started to tremble. I really dunno what else I can do. Or shall I stay at the bus stop or hang around Orchard till the morning and wait for the first train? I started to tear. Yes, I am scared. I want to go home.

A middle aged nice man talk to me. He said, "er, maybe you can try the night rider to see if it reaches the nearest place to your home?" Oh god! Thank God, it's a Saturday and there is a night rider. But the night rider doesnt drop me at the specific place where my home is. I boarded the night rider and started tearing again. I felt helpless and hopeless, really. I really have to thank Nadia for sms-ing me, at least I felt more concerned that someone is there for me even though she is not physically. Thanks babe. Then, Josiah's sms came. The sms came too late. I guess if I keep on waiting for his sms, I will eventually cry on the ground and couldn't do anything at all. The night rider lady bus driver talked to me, and even taught me a few bus routes to get home at night. I have to thank her too. She did not drop me at the place that I wanted. I still have to walk one LRT station before I reach home. But it's beter than I cant get home right? I reached home at 1.30am.

I WILL NEVER WORK OT AGAIN!!!

Thoughts

2009-04-24T03:04:00.000-07:00

Hadn't had a great week... Been working night shifts, going home late... Thought that I have got to know a new friend, but... it was kinda a disappointment... it really takes time to understand a person in depth. That's a problem when you and the friend doesnt understand each other much, and ended up in an argument. He thought, I thought... Everything seems to be an assumption. It will just end up to make an ass out of you and me. (Ass-u-me)

So what if both are of the same religion? It doesnt guarantee that you will last forever. I let you know what I expect, cos' I wanna be honest with you, let you know what I want. I also ask for your expectations, because I wanna know what you want. I have been through how it is like and I know how it feels. That's the reason why I have been trying my best to be better. I don't aim for the best, but for the better. Is such thing unreasonable? To people out there, it's really important to know wat is like and what is love. Ready yet dunno what is love? That's kinda contradicting, isn't it? I guess maturity still needs to be nurtured more... That's also includes me... It's a great homework to learn.

Working with HuiHui starting from Mon, office hours. And working at night shifts... Hopefully I can take it.. cos i know it's going to be a tiring journey for me... Keep it up!!! Move!!!

My one-day hairstyle...

2009-04-18T09:46:00.000-07:00

Nice?

Written in the Library @ Esplanade

2009-04-15T11:04:00.000-07:00

15 April 2009, Wednesday
2:16pm

I went for my second interview at Citibank this morning. It was pouring heavily outside. I gave a call to the HR person in-charge. I'm glad that God is with me. Due to the heavy rain, I informed that I might be 20 mins late. But unexpectedly, I was only 5 mins late, which did not keep her waiting and panicking. The interview went smoothly, until it came to a point when she said this that made a pause to our interview conversation. "To be frank with you, the jobscope of a collections officer is totally different from your marketing major, and just to tell you that it might not bring you anywhere in the long-run." "Yes, I understand.." I replied and paused with a slight astonishment. This is the second interview that they called for me, but that doesn't seem convincing that I may get the job. Will I? I felt shit.

Well, so as long as the interview is over, I felt a stone lighter. I had a little breakfast at The Coffee Bean in Suntec City and got myself changed into the casual dress that my friends have bought for me on my birthday. Went to Carrefour to get myself some plasters, my heels are giving me blisters.

I took my time strolling in Suntec City all by myself. Noticed a push cart, and a caucasian man staring at me. He was looking for a model for hair curling. He appraoched me as I was trying to walk away. "Come, I will curl your hair for free." Free? Yes, it is free, and it draws alot of attention from the public. He made big curls for me. I felt like the "Covergirl" on the magazine. "You are beautiful. Do you have a boyfriend?" The man asked me. "Oh no, I think I look like a nerd." Not because of the curled hair, but I really think I look nerd with my pair of spectacles that I have been wearing all along these years. So, since the curling is free, I thanked the man and went off. Kind of rude huh? Being a polite girl, I aksed him about the curler that he offers. Brand is called Jose something, $160, life-time warranty.. Hmm.. Perhaps I can try to get one when I have save enough money. And definitely I want to curl my hair on my 21st birthday.:)

I enjoyed my walk alone, quiet and peaceful. I am a person with low sense of directions. So, blindfully, I followed my own instincts and the directory boards and made my way to the Library @ Esplanade. I walked to the Dance section corner and shoved a few ballet books after a short browse. Not really interested in the contents of dance but more to the pictures of the positions that attracts my attention. I took a seat by the seaview couch. I believe it is an inexpensive, or perhaps priceless way to spend the afternoon after the morning showers.

Patience and commitment..

2009-04-10T22:56:00.000-07:00

I admit that I want some attention from my love one, but not to the extent that I want him to be 24 hours by my side. I just realised that its getting a bit worrying when your love one disappear for more than 24 hours, isnt it? or perhaps going to reach about 48 hours... this is what that really worries me. disappear and without letting you know how is he doing...

Blame it on myself. I felt insecure. Because my ex, disappeared for many weeks.. then months... i waited and waited... And forever he is gone. I just want to say, the waiting is tormenting. I hate the wait. This time again, I'm afraid, afraid that he will never come back... even if he is not a foreigner, he has his own legs and he can go wherever he wants, and keep me away from his life. I don't ask for much. Just a simple message each day if you are really busy, am I asking too much? Can't spare me a few mins to give me a simple sms? His commitment in other things seem to occupy him fully, what about me? I know that coming up he has a special event to help his friend out, but I didn't expect that it takes him almost half of the week... Ya, I guess I don't understand how important that event is to his friend and him. Perhaps, I am really a nobody. Yes, I don't understand.. I really don't... "If this is what you really think, I have nothing to say.."- This is hurtful. I'm worried for you yet you don't see it..

Maybe my concerns are redundane? There are actually many "what if"s in my head for the past 2 days.. What if he got an accident? What if he don't wake up? Which hospital? When will he wake up? or.. What if he passed out in some quiet places where no one notice him? So many "what if"s... What is going on? I am just concerned... If I am really someone who is important in your life, should you show some importance that I stay in your heart? At least an sms to tell me how you are doing? If this goes on... What will our future be like? Are you going to treat me and our children like this too? So you are placing me at a side? I know... I am the side salad of your main course.

Ok... I will try to understand. But I hope this won't happen again. Even if there is need to, please let me know why you will be away for the period, so I won't be worried.. hao bu hao?... :(

WOOHOO!!!

2009-04-07T10:46:00.000-07:00

Woohoo!! Hang out with the girls today.. first of all, i was late hahaha...cos woke up in the morning to help Sis with farming in Punggol n SengKang and went home late to get changed... responses are good! Hopefully Sis can make more rentals:) Well well.. when me n gfs are together, we will nv abandon our premium hobby-SHOPPING!! did a little of shopping at Bugis... I bought a watch.. black in colour, looks so Anna Sui lah.. i love princess-ie things hahaha... so girly now.. gila girly gila girly?? hahaha... Nad bought 3, ALL BROWN watches hahaha... she bought it for herself n her parents...we were saying she should buy for all her siblings too, then she can get a family series ahaha... wad de...

Then a while later the 3 pretty n gorgeous ladies bought a "TRISM" dangling earrings ahaha... we put it on and felt like we are back to the days of our ya ya times during school.. aww... so miss it... time passes quickly and we went "our seperate ways".. haha.. no lah.. Nad went home, I went to work n Babie went for her dance class...:) more hungouts to come ya?

Kinda dreadful cos i dun want to go work... received a phone call from CitiBank for interview this Thur.. interview for "professional loan shark" hahaha... wonder how it will be like? lol... But so far so good!!! Got alot of tips for tonight!!! Yay... $33.30... tip tip tip.. more to come... a day to rest tomorrow.. prepare for Thur interview..:)

This is the watch i bought...oh god... I realised i got jug ears....! Ah ah sey.. someone showed her cutie dimples leh hehehe...Ms Suka n her secretary... Norman Suka.. Suka Sujis Pte Ltd. mcm faham...

Babie n me... haha..Babie do you I purposely wear purple? hahaha... aiya u nv pounce on me... wasted ahahaha.... our complexion so good here... hehehehe... n our top colours go well too!! Babie I love you haha...

Josiah's Dog.. isnt it cute?

2009-03-30T12:04:00.000-07:00

Silky is dying. lol.

Random Shots

2009-03-26T01:03:00.001-07:00

"Classy Business woman" in the night streets.

Female President with her dog. *Salute!*

Young girls @ Clean & Clear Advertisement.

The soul on this piece of land for sale.

New model coming up...

The lady lost her directions. wahaha...

Happy 21st Birthday to Ah Lim!

2009-03-25T13:15:00.001-07:00

Went to Ah Lim's 21st Biethday celebration at D'Kranji Farm Resort.. Happy Birthday, Lady!!! Let the pics tell the story...:)

At the BBQ pit...

Ok, pls go to other people.. we want to eat haha.. dun disturb us... keke!

Smile!

Babies and Birthday Girl...

Let's jump with joy!! ha.. very tired! 1.5 belly girls..

Wait, not ready yet! NG NG!! Again! 1 belly girl...

Ok, this is better..:) Haa, 2 belly girls...

Your Glance and Your Help

2009-03-20T11:27:00.000-07:00

Back again this hols I went back to work at Dan Ryans... it was kinda tormenting on me cos I really felt that every step that I walk from the station to the workplace was heavy and dreadful... I needed money, but I have to keep on going, work and earn myself a living... I dont really have a choice...

He glanced me for a few times in the kitchen... I have never see him smile for a long time... a long long time... my heart just happen to ache sometimes whenever I stepped into the kitchen to chuck the finished dishes... I cant help it at times... What can I do? Nothing. Today, I am too short to reach a round soup plate from the shelf. I cant believe that I'm too short, perhaps I've shrunk. Cos I haven been eating well. He helped me with the plate without a word. I felt a distant. Truly, a distant. He is no longer that friendly to me. He bent his head real low to the plate as he garnishes the cheese mix on the potato skins. Is that a pretence that he didnt see me? Well, I just know that my heart really aches, like the acid pouring over a wound.

Another long dreadful shift from coming Monday to Friday. Hopefully I can survive through it. It's Huiqi's birthday coming up. And I have to get her something. Angel, save up some money and get your good friend a good gift on her 21st. Career fair on Sat, go or not go? Zhiwei ask me to go with him.. well meet him again? I dont like him. I shall just be in silence. Should go back to Mum's house and do some packing. Mum is moving on 28March09, and we have to get rid of all our stuff out of that rented flat. No more mahjongs at my place for the time babes, sorry about it. Planning for my adult dance class again. Got an offer to use a multi-purpose hall in a condo in Admiralty. I believe it's a blessing. And I got one more student. More students please? And more more busy please...

I MET A KIND SOUL! maybe my husband can be an optometrist??

2009-03-11T08:52:00.000-07:00

It was another day of holiday for me... the sky was drizzling, and stupid me went to hang out my laundry... hopefully its alright? Little brother's spectacles spoilt, and i went to the optometrist with him to get his spects fixed...

I went into the shop and looked around, saw this poster advertising on colored contact lenses... I stared at it for a while cos i thought of changing to a non-spects image... (tat's my dream) This nice guy (Kenneth) started talking to me and asked if there's anything he could help. I asked him about the prices, lifespan and astigmatism if I am to purchase a pair of contact lenses. He checked my eye degree for me. Then he gave me a pair of disposable colored contact lenses for free!!! Can you believe it? It's free!! Why on earth is he so nice to me man? OMG!~ I'm not wearing anything revealing ok... maybe I'm beautiful? "I'm beautiful, it's true..." hahaaa... Mr Kenneth then flashes his namecard to me and ask me to look for him again soon... Shall I look up for him?? heh. (twitch eyebrows)

Hmm... I used to think about my future husband... I want him to be an architect/ engineer so that he can build me a house or a ship yacht.. I want him to be a doctor so that when I am sick or deliver babies it will be free and I wont be scared or shy cos my hubby see not others... I want him to be a banker so that he knows the importance of saving up for future finances... but I have never thought of my future husband to be a businessman, cos I know I might fight with him for business... cos "it's none of his business!" lol...

hmm OPTOMETRIST? hehe... not bad huh... nottie girl leh... stop it angeline, stop it... lol.

Condo viewing and Sister's photoshoot

2009-03-05T04:19:00.001-08:00

Went out with Sister again today. These few days have been acting like her PA, helping her carrying her stuffs, apartment viewing, photoshoot, printing and farming of flyers... I start to love the job as a so called part-time "real estate consultant".. Took about 2 weeks break for enjoyment and spending time with Sister and frens before going back to Dan Ryans next Wed.. I supposed I wont be at Dan Ryans for long. Thought of changing to something better, something that deserve me more hee...

Went to the photoshoot with Sister at JeanYip. Such a long time. The air-con so cold there. I had worn the wrong dress (too short)... in the end bought a denim cardigan :) hmm, will I get to have a photoshoot like Sister? I want a photoshoot album on my 21st birthday... ... will I have it?

After that, went to Samson's office with Sister to get her banner done. Received such a nice comment from Samson... "Wah, so free today ah..." -_-lll My reply was like, "ya ya, I'm free almost everyday ok... hahaha.." wth.

Right after banner measurements done, went to a condo viewing with Sister at Costa De Sol. It was a sea view condo, 7 swimming pools, near Changi Airport..but it doesnt really interest me cos the rooms are VERY small!!! I felt like a hamster when I stepped into the apartment. Dint manage to take pictures like I usually love to cos the tenant was watching, not feeling very comfortable cos I pretended as my Sister's PA... lol. "I know la, you doubt me for being her PA.. dun look at me that way leh..." haha...~"hi, nice to meet you." that's the only thing I said as I shook the tenant's hand... wth.

Finally home... Had kinda a bad hair day since the morning. So... took Sister's hair clip to hairdo abit so I will look neater and fresher... My little brother is such a good photographer, isnt it? hehe.. I din know that I look so nice lah... hahaha... guys and girls, I believe your eyes are rolling yeah? lol.

Meeting Claris!!

2009-03-04T07:53:00.000-08:00

Met Claris at Compass Point today! Felt like a decade that I have not met her hahaha... miss her laughter and decided to ask her out for a lunch together. In the end, it turn out to be lunch and dinner...lol. we chatted so much, but really had a great time catching up with each other. :)

These are what she gave me:) CareBears erasers, so cute! I love it..:) Thank you Claris..

Went into the music school.. saw this "red" guitar... aiyo, i miss sayang nadia la... :(

We went to "Subway eat fresh!" Was just wondering, how come the tomato that I eat always dun have the head stem? hahaha.. wad a stupid qns that pop out from my mind...-_-lll

As usual, Claris will always complain that she is thirsty... Drinks are never enough for her... She can never live in the desert... Maybe in her last life she is a camel?? hahhaah...

Scratch and win... sigh... how we wish we can win a car man... always dismay hahaha... in the end got a 16oz drink and a free cookie! not bad la...

Hope to meet up wif other frens again soon... missing u all..:) May God bless u all...:)

Show flats and sushi!

2009-03-02T06:15:00.000-08:00

Went out with Sister to a few show flats today..:) i'm so in love with the ambience there... wow, fantasizing on my future home... hee...

A landed house. The dining area.

Toilet.- City View Condo.

Little bedroom.- City View Condo.

I love the carpet! hmm...

The balcony... how i wish my home is like that...:)

Nice lighting at the dining area.. romantic...

Another favourite room for "hardworking student" like me... hee..

" My hubby and my room..." Imagine...

the model. got light le...:)

hello.

having a rest here. so tired, stil having flu...

i'm feeling like a fantasy here, paparazzi all e way...

Sushi time with Sister!!!

Sister looked disgusted, isnt it?? haha...

yay... my favourite! good for complexion hehe...

tori kaarage chix. eat so fast forget to take the pic.. haha

mini sashimi.. not veri nice leh... ha...

JieMin's birthday & outing with Samson

2009-02-28T09:01:00.001-08:00

Went to Changi Airport T1 with Samson to fetch his frens, Jeremy and Erica from KL.

While waiting... omg... am i in the India Airport??? haha i stood so far from them la... lol.

I look like a foreign tourist who just alighted at the India Airport, isnt it?? haha..

the skytrain is something like the LRT. its been a long time that i have been to the airport. thanks Samson:)

Superdog treated by Samson. Had almost the whole day at Vivo with him... eating, shopping, eating eating and eating!!! oh my!!! meet him once but ate thrice!! Superdog is the 3rd indulgence... before that went to Food Republic and Coffee Bean.. whoohoo... cheesecake and ice blended caramel, my favourite!!!! yum!!! thank you Samson once again!! "how are you going to slim down?" Just like what dear had said.. sigh..how..

My favourite darling: Jasmine Cheong JieMin

She is my life buddy man... we r best frens since 5 years old!!

Happy 21st Jasmine!!! Best frens always...

A jar of jelly beans for Jasmine. I hope she will like it cos it represents my blessing to her for a colourful life!!!

Happy 21st Birthday once again to Jasmine!!! Love you always!!!

The Holidays

2009-02-27T01:18:00.001-08:00

It's holidays but i have been kinda tired... jus dunno why.. kinda stress on which uni courses to apply for... cant sleep in the night... can u believe it? make my uni application in the morning at 3am?? nuts... aha, nadia know what i have been doing huh?? keke...

Btw, applied for NTU, my choice of courses:
1) Business
2) Psychology
3) Sociology
4) Arts (Education) - MOE hahah
5) Chinese- xiao er?! haha...

Hmm.. stil applying for the other universities.. hopefully i can get in... :) omg, there's so much to do for uni applications.. and kinda some problems for me when it comes to the family particulars and financial supports.. cos daddy n mummy din stay wif me... sigh... emo.. lol. (thot of fuancake suddenly..)

Recall of the day after we ended our last paper:

Ahahaha.. someone caught soaking her legs in the "no swimming" pool... lol

"gotcha!"

this emo girl in her own world with her mp3. haha.

thank you daphne! i think this is a veri nice picture:)

so is this! "small girl wif a lollipop"... haha. tht's e benefit of wearing a dress.. next time dun wear jeans ok... :p

I love u girls...

I was telling them, "why spend the money on the fish spa since u can have a free one here just without the fishes??" lol

my favourite hee..

A very belated christmas gift given by Thomas, Wenfang and family!! isnt tht sweet?? hehe..

hehe... little samuel... wad an adorable babie...

More fun to come!!!

End of Exams!

2009-02-25T23:05:00.001-08:00

End of the last paper..all our eyes look tired right?? fatigue faces... except lina hahaha... had a lil photo session outside the exam lounge...

More celebration pics to be uploaded soon!! At the mean time, happy holidays to all!!! :)

(eh, where's nadia??lol...)

Talking to a Bastard

2009-02-23T01:16:00.000-08:00

enzz: hi
me: helo
enzz: u how old?
me: 21
me: u?
enzz: 21 too
me: :)
enzz: u studying or working?
me: i head yr bd chalet is booked
me: heard*
enzz :u heard from who?
me: studying
me: from yr msn
me: i was online jus now
enzz: ic haha ok
me: happy bd in adv:)
enzz: haha still long la
me: ??
me: are u studying too?
enzz: nope waiting for gerad ceremony and ns
me: icic
enzz: yup
me: :)
me: is tt pic really u?
enzz: ya
me: look like jay chou
me: ahaha
enzz: cannot b la
me: haha
me: i gotta go
enzz: how come?
me: having exams tml
enzz: wad exam?
me: i surf net for awhile only
me: integrated marketing comm
me: see ya
me: take care
enzz: wait la
me: ??
enzz: u open ma??:P
me: ??
enzz: i mean u openminded ma?
me: why?
me: wad u wan to ask
enzz: no la ha ha ask u loh
me: ask me wad
enzz: ask u if u r open
me: so wad wil u ask if i am open
me: ?
enzz: ask for ur 3 measurement loh
me: u r nuts
enzz: y
me: if u want to know ppl as frens
me: there is not a need to ask for stats
enzz: no la jus wondering ma
me: u r jus judging ppl by the looks
me: why wonder?
enzz: no i did not
me: then why ask for stats? isnt that lust?
me: it doent seem tht i ask u how long yr penis are
me: right>
enzz: its ok wad
me: well
me: there's nothing to tok about like these stuff
me: going around to tell ppl yr stats?
me: haha
enzz: not everyone ask u wad
me: i think something is wrong wif u
me: u should see a doc
enzz: y
me: yr mind is filled wif lust
me: thts all
me: bb
enzz: fill wif lust only wad
me: well
me: guys who r filled wif lust i wont bother much
enzz: its jus coz ur a christian?
me: nope
me: even if i m not a christian
me: is there a need to share those things?
me: only my bf can know
me: i dun hav to share it wif the public n let ppl wonder about me
enzz: wonder y would i wonder
me: oh thanks
me: tt'll b good
me: if u cant rem
me: pls scroll up
me: u stated u wonder
me: u can ask other girls for stats
enzz: my wonder mean thinking
me: u got the wrong person
me: well
me: if u wan to get to know a fren in depth
me: i guess yr qns shouldnt be these things
me: know a fren by heart n not physical
me: if u gt wad i mean
enzz: ok
me: so ya.. i got to go
me: take care
enzz: k bye

-end chat-

well, a lust bastard like this definitely deserve a lecture. dun u think so? 21 yet so childish... time to grow up boy...

Moral of story: rem that making frens is not about physical, its the heart that matters. dun go around telling ppl how big boobs u have or how long penis u got. so what even they are big n long? does it matter? can exchange for money meh? u think transactions? hahaha...

My "Dear Dear"

2009-02-21T22:53:00.000-08:00

Hello! I am Angel's new "dear dear" ahaha... nice to meet u all...

Name: Benjamin Leong

Age: 24

D.O.B: 18 October 1985

Horoscope: Libra

Studying in: NTU, Engineering

" Dear dear... can i hug u? miss u always...- benjamin dear dear."

the one and only "studio photoshoot"

2009-02-18T01:23:00.000-08:00

i know this might look wrong.. but i like the couch... thanks to the photographer... :)

hmm, rem tht my ex bf loves taking photo shots. but has never rem tht he took like these for me... what a waste ahahaha...:p

End of Projects...

2009-02-11T03:05:00.000-08:00

This is my last presentation... not very well done i guess... cos i answered stupidly in Q&A, pretending to be "professional" hahaha...

My "Darlings" and me... i felt crushed aha..

We are the "agents"!

That's his only style...yo!

Neutron and Angel.

Hello!

Trying our best to arch in a cute way.. ??... lol.

Spongebob and me.

the "chios".tm.

why is my babie the only one in front? what is sayang and ahlim doing to me?? lol.

the NYP models.

Us and erm.. ms lena yeo.

squeeze and smile!

hehe!!!

Had a great time taking pics with the class after all our presentations! whoohoo..."Good job! keep it up!! pat on the back!!" hehe...

Had a little "mahjong night" at my place with the darlings.. had heineken... how much? erm i dunno hahaha... spent a wonderful night wif my babie... hehe... (thinkin wad huh?)

I seriously think that these 3 words are very strong impact to me:

"I love you.." awww.... cant say it all the time.. only say it when u meant it... and it will be remembered... :) thank you sayang...

Looking forward to more mahjong!! yay... jiayou for exams everyone!!:)

Overly stress...

2009-02-08T11:48:00.000-08:00

I realised that i'm so overly stressed and have been taking crazy pics as stress therapy...

Saw this while doing research for proj and was so in love wif it! cos' it's white!! OMG!!! USD$59.90- Charles & Keith.
buy/ not buy??

After ED Day Presentation. I like this the best.. so kawaii lah ahaha...
I think i look like a property agent/ lawyer?? ahaha... she's my beloved secretary...

-I supposed i am stress & had crazy n stupid guts to do something foolish.-
Duno what's wrong wif me... hugged someone whom i dun love at all cos he initiated to hug me. hugged him cos i was treating him as allan. sucks. thank god it's jus a hug, nothing else. i dun want it to and it will not happen again!

I LOVE ENTRE!!! :) thank you my cutie group members...

2009-02-06T08:46:00.000-08:00

Hi, welcome to HITS... this will be the layout of our biz floor plan...:)

Here's some recipe books for the little children who attend HITS' courses.

This is the Admin room, with the photocopying machine..

This is the Storage Room...

Young Bubbles.

Active Sparks.

Green Pebbles.

Holding area where parents could wait for their children to finish their courses.

An open-concept with glass windows.

Brought to you by:

Home Independence Training School (HITS)

Projects week!!!

2009-02-05T08:02:00.000-08:00

random 1
random 2

random 3

Soo Kee Jewellery!

HITS! yay...:)

These few days are kinda bloody for me... almost everyday sleep at 4plus in the morning, n have to wake up at 8am... Usually I dun make such sacrifices, unless for those projects that I have to do... Spent quite much $$$ on the printing of proj reports and bloody cab fares cos i was late for meetings in the mornings... suck...

CNY i was very sick, din have a proper reunion dinner, slept my whole night cos of high fever and migraine... after CNY, everyday projects, projects and endless projects!!! meetings never seem to be enough... somehow not very efficient in certain projects...

Tues had two presentations... one in the morning and one in the afternoon... morning had a "proposal meeting" presentation... afternoon had a role play of service blueprint, I role played as a Doctor, and my "diabetic patient" - HuiQi... haha... realised that this sem wasnt really great... cos u nv get to choose your own proj team mates, everything is decided by the tutors...then, you get to know the true colours of the diff people as they work with u in the projs... had miscommunications, intolerance, silent conflicts, and kena stabbed at the back by downgrading you in peer evaluation... that's like a battle.. no matter how much efforts you put, people will still regard that you din put in much and they dun appreciate... fine.

Wed had a presentation on Soo Kee Jewellery.. dunno what's wrong with me tt day.. kinda nervous for presentation and kept forgetting what i should say, and stupidly dunno how to link up te different points into my own words... din role play, most of the teams does... and our team felt that we din really put in much efforts...hmm...

Thurs, presentation on AdConnect's "Be Different"campaign.. we were late cos we got stuck at that stupid printing shop... late for 15 to 20 mins... Mr Wee was kinda disappointed... i was the first speaker, rushed up to the room, put down my bag and immediately start the presentation as requested... wth.. i'm still panicking lah... halfway through, Mr. Wee stopped us n made us sit down.. he toked to us about punctuality and presentation etiquettes... we are feeling so guilty cos we r late.. jus wondering if he will downgrade us...

3 yrs in my poly life, i had nv felt the downgrade of PE thingy and being late for presentations... everything that happened this sem seems to be a shock to me... so much flaws! horrible flaws!!!

Jus one more ED Day presentation to go and one more IM presentation to go.. hopefully it wont be as bad as those previous few projs... i wanna see sunshine... but i realised i get to see "sunrise" often and ended up like a puffed up face dark eye ringed panda...

Jiayou jiayou! Projects will be over soon and exams will come! my GOD!!!

School...Projects...

2009-01-17T02:46:00.000-08:00

When you are stress in school.. what is the best thing to do with your friend?

Indulgence of food, and take a "corky pic" to show how happy and contented you are with the food even though you are mentally, physically and emotionally stress..haha...

What if there is no food on your table? And you have to stay in that boring and dreadful tutorial?

Come on, isnt it easy? Just take any friend's phone and take a pic of yourself, try to smile... lol.

Still stress? Why not attend a drama production with your friend and chuck all these things at the back of your head first??? smile!

Hmm... stil not enough? Have more fun with your friend, attend events-Block8.
Spend ample time with friends is the best thing to relax yourself...

Hahaha... if too bored at home and wanna take some time out from projects, feel free to check out yr friends' facebook and keep a copy of their mcm faham pics lol...

Well well, when u see yr friends in school.. it will make your day just to see their faces.. and "what they wear"... hahaha... this is not pakat... it's telepathy.......... "couple greens"...

To "celebrate" that telepathy and identification, smile and take a shot together, at different directions... erm, how many shots have we taken?? lol.

"i love school"

and

"i love projects"-wth.

...Time for projects...

Meeting outs n surprises!!

2009-01-04T08:12:00.000-08:00

Sister brought me to punggol marina for dinner after church service...road to the place veri de ulu malu...but wow... lots of yachts n jet skis... nice breeze... so romantic place... seafood and steamboat restaurants by the sea, PUBS... oh gosh... BEER... i miss u...hehe... but i migraine, so never drink.. hmmm... plsssssss...... next time ok sis??? lol.

jet ski model.. kawasaki...

i love the lights... "cos i'm dreaming..."

the swimming pool at the restaurant

xmas gift from huihui

gift from xiaobing- brought from lake toba

xmas gift from ziya

before i unwrapped them.. hee, diff colours.. i like..

my rainbow dress.. bd pressie from claris, jas, n flor

x'mas gift from jas.. jasmine scent haha...

n this, from claris tan.. lol

Whoo! Met Jasmine on Sat evening for a chat at starbucks... so long time we din really catch up with each other... we laughed so much haha... she treat me coffee, i treat her dinner hehe.... din know that the coffee shop at punggol park is jus in between where we both live!! Went to her void deck and meet my favourite dog, WaWa...

WaWa advertising bacon ham?? haha... "it always tastes great!"

Wad are u emo-ing??

Nottie WaWa kena lectured by her owner... "U so naughty ah u!!!"

So cute! look at her eyes.. veri photogenic....*whistle!*

preety girlie is shooting on a MTV... air blow her fur effect.. lol.. sunsilk ad... :p

Next plan, Chinatown.. hehe... go squeeze!! claris, pls come this time!! CNY coming leh... let's hang out together...

N my beautiful n charming mcm faham babes... shall we go Little India/ Bugis?? hehehe... i wanna jalan jalan leh...

Angel from 2009

2009-01-01T10:18:00.000-08:00

A happy girl saying hi to you:

Ok... finally, this is the new year. Happy New Year to all. May u all be happy, blessed and beautiful and hansome! of course, intelligent with substance! ha.

Angeline has finished 2 bloody reports. her christmas wasnt fun on 2008. cos she spent days n nights working on projects. she missed the time with God in church, but she remembers that she is talking to God every single day..:) She got a starry bracelet and a small pouch of christmas candies from her very nice fren, Claris Tan Si Hui. that's her first christmas gift that she received a few days after christmas. but, Angeline is happy. She is contented with wad she has... thank you for being my fren... i'm wearing it now...:)

Angeline is busy with school. She is kinda tense-up lately, stressed. She's broke, saving up money to save herself. She's been drinking tea, trying to slim down her tummy. On New Year, she received an sms from her ex bf. That's weird. She no longer keep his contact number, but he does keep it. He said happy new year to her. That's the second "Happy New Year" he said to her... actually he dun have to do that. Cos' Angeline has forgotten this man. She got a new man. And the new man left. She believe that another better person will come, cos' she believe that God has the best plans for her. She deserve someone better. Someone that doesnt hurt her heart. Sorry to say that she has forgotten the man (ex).. Cos' Angeline needs to move on with her life..

And very soon, she is going to teach tambourine dance in the adult class... She is planning hard what to teach, songs to choose, choreographies to create... n work on hard with her voice, to sing the new song coming up with her music frens in church... Angeline has prepared some packets of candies for her kids in Sunday School. She cant wait to see their smiley faces when she gave them the candies! Angeline is feeling happier now.. cos' she realised that she has so much frens to support her and love her... She is blessed... So are you, my frens! Smile and walk with me...

Disappointment

2008-12-27T09:28:00.000-08:00

Today, is considered my last day at work before my 3 months break for studies. final year, final semester.. I told Carol and Jacq that I need a break for studies. that's my excuse to them. but it is a partial excuse actually. the other 50% excuse is because i want to disappear myself from Teddy Bear's life. cos i told him in the sms. we can never even be frens. he chose to keep quiet and got me no answer. no more anything like last time.. i actually miss those days when we are so happy together..had supper after work and he send me home... i dun mind if our togetherness needs to spend alot or little... important is we spend time together... sigh..

I gave Justine, Veron and Zara my contacts... Zara, Veron and Joanne looked sad... cos i will be away.. 3 months.. Zara is going back to US on 19 Jan 09... So, i wont get to see her again, unless she come back to Singapore, which i think will be less likely... I will miss u all... So many.. Jacq, Joanne, Faiszal, Tini, Justine, Emman, Veron, Zara, Lisa, Kumar and you, Allan. Though we didnt talk for a long period of time and we both felt like we drifted apart, like we have not met before. I guess today we dun look at each other, and we will not again... i will be out of yr life, as i have said... these 3 months, we wont see each other, ok.... I flipped my notebook and saw the note u wrote for me.. u said u love me... sob... is this true? what shall i do with those things that u had given me??? teddy bear is innocent. its a gift from you. teddy bear symbolises our love. how?... i am really disappointed...

I have moved to Sis' house before Christmas... will be staying for months... Christmas this year wasnt anything for me to be happy... i am broke.. din buy any presents n i din go to church... i need a time to be alone... think of how i want my life to be and how am i going to make myself happy wif life... without teddy bear these few nights by my side i felt empty... i so miss to touch teddy bear's face so i can feel like i'm touching yr face. so miss to cuddle it so i can feel like u embrace me in yr arms... these feelings left me... teddy bear was abandoned at the home in yishun...

Goodbye Allan.

Move on with a smile.

2008-12-18T19:11:00.000-08:00

Last night i couldnt sleep with peace.. i felt stress pressing on my chest area.. n i felt like crying.. cos i dun feel good... i felt insecure.. n its like there is no tomorrow for me.. i felt like i am losing breath... guys, this is not joking. i have never felt tt way before. u nv know when yr life will end. u may jus end yr last breath in a sleep and being described as unnatural death.

Perhaps these weeks i have been thinking alot. esp on Teddy Bear. As usual he is always silent. The more i wait the more i felt uneasy. I have been asking myself, "what is this waiting for?" I guess it is really sudden infatuations during these months between me and him. Things are just happening too fast. I know it shouldnt be, yet our emotions took control of ourselves. Lately i felt like i am so irritating to him, calling and sms-ing him.. he hardly answers or replies. I want to apologise to him for being so irritating cos i dont want to be like that n give that bad impression. so, i wrote him a long letter, apologising, thanking, my sentiments and advices to him in life...

After work, i din go home. I have a new colleague, named Zara, age 24. She has no home. Her parents are in US and all her siblings are scattered around in different countries. She put up at her friend's place but last night her fren went relatives' place to stay. So Zara was left alone, dunno where to go, no home, and was planning to wander around in the streets. At the same time, i was rather emotional. So we kept each other company at our workplace. Teddy Bear knocked off at 12am. Colleagues persisted him to stay and talk to me. But he rushed home without talking, cos he was catching the last train. Well, what to talk about? Everything are written in the letter. I dunno what to talk also. I am not disappointed that he went off w/o me. I rather he jus go home. and in the end i want to go home too. I felt feverish, guess i'm getting sick. So i took a cab home.. so expensive... i should hav gone home earlier...

Woke up and thought about it.. well, i guess i should recover. better get healed earlier than later. cos i had enough hurt.. whatever it is, Christmas present is already made and i shall jus pass it to him soon.. cos i dun want to keep it. Maybe he is one of the angels in my life and we may jus be fated to be frens. Thank you for all e care and concerns that you have for me in the past. You gave me good memories. I really have to thank you for that, cos you took my ex away from my life journal... right now, i want to concentrate on my last semester before graduation.cos this is my life and i think it is more important to me. We can still be friends, ya? I hope you dun think that i am having any motives. As what Becky had taught me, be professional and be strong. There's not a need to quit the job cos you need the money for yr family. Yes, I will be. I must move on... smile Angel... :)

I am sorry...

2008-12-13T10:32:00.000-08:00

Teddy Bear, I am sorry...

I said you are useless. I am really sorry... I hurt you... Its all my fault.. I shouldnt be in this picture.. I felt like a slut...

I know you love me. Cos you cant answer and stop me from asking you this question... you claim that i am someone special for you... so am i feeling the same...

You said you need space. Ok, i understand. But pls, dun tell me jus be frens. I really believe and have faith that we can work out together... will you? I am willing to give more time for us. And pls show to me tt my time for you is worth waiting... I really love you loads...

I wish to see a future ahead of us... I dun mind about yr past.. cos what i really care is the present and the future... will you give me your hand? shall we walk together?

Stress Relieve...YESH!

2008-12-11T07:04:00.000-08:00

Alright.. finally drawn my layout for Entre n submitted it with the group report.. big stone put down man... hmm, Mr Toh Tse Ming, tt old man tutor, always make me, Babie and ShiHui laugh crazily in silence...u know tt kind of feeling like u cant laugh out loud and u have to control tt laughing sound? ahhaha... wth, train our cheeks and tummy muscles... lol... have to b serious in proj.. got to think of 5 qns for the market research survey.. meeting on wed and fri 11am... jiayou cute entrepreneurs... ...

So not focusing in class today... blindly copied and copied notes... cos, my mind is already in the holidays ahaha...

Limei laoshi called me regarding tambourine dance. Oh... next year's task. I'm in-charge to teach the new batch in church.. the 30-50 yr olds... can i make it? kinda scared n felt a bit stressed.. cos all of them are obviously older than me... they are like my mothers la... n i am their "teacher"... so which means, when talking to them i hav to be veri polite too... but, i'm not ver polite to my own mum la ahaha... well, she's like a fren to me... i can slap her thighs n she can slap mine anytime... lol... i accepted e task and will start to plan wad to do...hmmm...

Went to AMK Hub Coffee Bean with Nadia n HuiQi...to chill out... i was accidentally being spilled by some water from one of the barista at Coffee Bean.. she get serviettes for me to dry up... but its jus water i dun really mind actually... wah if its me last time, i sure "cho" till e person cry ahha... hmm, i think my attitude is improving.. i'm learning to b forgiving..

We were initially planning to do IM tut together during coffee. but in e end, we were so engrossed with the Looney Tunes performance at the centre stage... wad a good view...I like the Tweety Bird la hehehe...stil got Bugs Bunny and Silvester... I keep smiling when i see em...so happy keke...whoo, got a new bag for $10 only.. cos my bag spoil liao... mum help me sew the old one dunno how many times le.. time to change a new one...:) good deal!!

Hmm, what shall I get for my friends on Christmas? And shall I go JB for shopping?? yay... holidays...:)

Looking forward to holidays

2008-12-10T02:55:00.000-08:00

Here's to update some frens who wonder where have i been lately:

1 Dec (Mon): QM ICA... wth kept recalling on the terms like reduce waste, costs... improve productivity la... blah blah... nadia u know la huh?? keke...

2 Dec (Tue): Went to Gelare with the girls... had ice cream waffles again and "oxygenated water"-$1.20 per bottle... water say water la... mcm really come from wadever mountains/hills... lol. Then went to library to discuss the CRM software with Babie, Sayang and Hazel... whoo... we had wedges and chix chunks...yum...

3 Dec (Wed): eh, wad did i do?? I suppose i was at home doing my PS & NEG ICA report... whole day ok... previous days got do but not as intensive as this day... and surprisingly I'm so motivated to do my IMC tutorial! not bad.. keep it up girl!

4 Dec (Thur): Busy like a bee. Chiong-ing my PS & NEG report till late night... can't really believe that someone can try to make use of you by adding u on msn jus to ask u to help giv tips on report... wth...well, i shouldnt mention names... but, wad i want to say is.. pls be responsible in your own work and last min work doesnt help much either. worst of all, be attentive in class. dun try to dig the well when the fire burns your ass...

5 Dec (Fri): Something wrong with my thumbdrive.. cant be detected by the com at printing shop... i panick so much la... thanks lina for lending me yr thumbdrive.. thank god I managed to have my report printed before 5pm. submitted with Sayang at Mike Cheong's office. Chilled out at school library cafe with girls n crapped for about 2 hours... whoohoo... good to relief stress...

Met fuancake for dinner at fish n co... wow, we really talked the whole night...libra people always heart to heart emo alot ahahah... Teddy Bear called me in the midst of dinner. "Why u call me?" "Nothing..." "Huh? then u call me for what?? then i hang up the phone lo... wrong number ahahaha.." its so obvious la.. call me cos u miss me.. heheh... mcm faham... reached home at 12 plus am...

6 Dec (Sat): Almost forgot about attending ZhangQiang n XinMin's wedding matrimony in the morning...oops! Went to work after an afternoon nap... haven start anything on Entre proj and SMK ica revision...

7 Dec (Sun): It's Sunday School Day... the kids so punctual... reach even before 3.30pm... beatrix called n she is still in e train... i jus stepped out of the house.. oh oh! bad example! students, pls dun be like yr teachers ahaha.. be punctual... had reh with em and did their makeup and put on their butterfly wings and ladybird/bee caps... so cute la... little tessa had tummy ache before perf ph gosh... too nervous? hehe... n little ryan walked straight up to me before bowing at the end of the perf... audience were laughing ahaha... guess wad he said to me?? "Teacher, I want to eat sweet.." LOL.

At night, chatted with Serene on Entre proj.. wow! she has done her part! whereas mi? ahah i haven even start la... wad a strong motivation... i started my part and did till next morning 5am... mum said i am crazy... ahaha...

8 Dec (Mon): PH... but, stayed at home and do Entre proj while discussing with Shihui on msn... watched Little Nonya hehehe... a bit slack la... SMK revision?? ahaha not yet...

9 Dec (Tue): Finally completed my report for Entre proj... phew... still got layout to draw.. hmm... shall leave it to Wed after the SMK ICA. Yes... must start revising liao... cant believe that I only started revising a night before the actual test... 4 lectures.. not bad... i have nv been so "hardworking" before... ahahaha.... had tummy upset and went to bed...

10 Dec (Wed): received a sms from Teddy Bear in the morning... "How is your tummy? Take care always..." so sweet... ok girl, stop fantasizing about Teddy Bear...

SMK ICA. no comments ahahaha.... get it over and done with... yayness!!!

Went to buy a chix ham n cheese pie and "paper chicken"... stupidly i ate the paper... I thought can eat... mum said I stupid... thank you for saying that lol. you are a GREAT MUM. ahahaha.

Time to draw layout!!! and will pay my fullest attention to Little Nonya... hehehe...

hmm..planning wad to wear on last day of sch before hols.. so looking forward to it... ... ...

Holidays here I come!!!!

Love is patience, love is kind...

2008-12-06T10:34:00.000-08:00

"Love is patience, love is kind." I remembered this verse since this morning when i attended ZhangQiang and XinMin's wedding matrimony... viewed the video which tells us that XinMin actually waited for ZhangQiang for 3 years when he is studying abroad. And now, they got married... I can really see that God's love for them really made it so great! Love is really patience...

These few days I have been thinking... what if i get a "sorry" on Christmas? I tried my best to be understanding and patient... but sometimes this is really a very tough thing to overcome... I felt so small, so unimportant... I tend to be angry with Teddy Bear easily... and threw my tantrums at him... i felt so bad seriously... perhaps, Christmas really is too fast for Teddy Bear to make a decision... I have to understand that he is having a hard time too... Shall I give him more time? Babie Daphy taught me to give Teddy Bear a time limit. I tried that way. But it seem to me that I am trying to be unreasonable to him and only think for myself... I felt that I did not place myself into the shoes of Teddy Bear... not thinking for him is hurting me too...

Talked to bestie and he advised me... "If you think he is worth to wait, go for it. No matter what, I will give you my support." Worth to wait? I thought n thought... i come to think of Teddy Bear's goodness... his care for me, and people around him... isn't he like a CareBear in the cartoon? Show you warmth, and smile to you, and make you happy... its something that you can't buy it no matter how much money or credit cards you have in yr wallet... this is priceless... i believe it...

Teddy Bear, I am really sincere in this relationship. I made my decision. I will wait for you... Because, Love is patience, love is kind. I will give you time...

Today

2008-12-03T07:36:00.000-08:00

Today. A date that I will not forget. I started my first relationship on this date just right 1 year ago. Time passes so quickly. So many things happened in 1 year... friends, love, hate, enemies-no friends... hahahaha...

I prayed to God... I believe He listens... he gave me another someone that truly loves me... :) so much more better than that previous bloody one... lol. bloody one. thinking of the first just turns me off from my appetite... yucks... why on earth have i got into such a bloody relationship? i think i'm blind... i chose a china product last time... cognitive dissonance... and finally got a divestment stage whoohoo!!! yayness...

I believe you are great, Teddy Bear...:) You really bright up my life... thank you for loving me... I understand you have to work and not much time for me... I am learning to adapt and be independent... I will give u time.. give myself some time too... seriously, I have never been so worried for someone like you before in my life of 20 years... i'm learning to be patient... and i know sometimes you are willing to let me scold you and be patient with me, and tell me that your heart aches when i cry... thank you for being so patient with my nonsense sometimes...i'm glad n thankful that you learn to use the chopsticks because of me..n gave me little teddy bear to hug when i miss you... that's really sweet of you... i'm glad to have you... i thank God for knowing you...:) i love you... :)

Alright, tml and Fri will be the Sunday School kids' camp.. gotta reach there at 8.30am... i must do some more of the report before bed!!! Be a good girl... n not let teddy bear worry too... :) Jiayou to all my friends... nights...

Zoo outing with Teddy Bear

2008-11-23T07:24:00.000-08:00

Teddy bear was late this morning! Late for 1.5 hours! As requested by him, gave him a morning call at 9.30am.. but in e end he went back to sleep again! In e morning I was preparing some sandwiches for him. In the midst of it I felt wrong, having the feeling that he is not awake yet and he will be late for sure... So I kinda dilly-dally on the sandwiches for another half an hour.. Called him at 10.30am...

Me: "Hello, where are u? Are u still at home?"

Teddy: "I'm still sleeping, Angel... yawn..."

Me: "What? What time is it now?"

Teddy: "9.30am..."

Me: "Huh? Hello, it's already 10.30am u know? What 9.30am? You faster wake up! Go and wash up! I'm going out of my house now... U be fast ok?"

Teddy: "Okay... sorry Angel... see you!"

I waited and waited... roughly 8-9 trains.. n he is still not here... fumes burning liao.. can be late for 1.5hr... he reached at 11.35am.. Teddy bear looked very tired.. his dark eye bags are still very obvious... "You are so late today..." I am kinda disappointed.. "I'm sorry Angel.. My phone wrote 9.30am jus now.." He showed me his phone.. All e time and date settings were gone... So, I kindly reset it back for him... "Alright... I forgive you..." but it just happened that he is tired and he is so quiet, whereas I am still kinda fuming although I forgave him... We both turned silent for some time in the train... mcm like mad wif each other.. but in e end, we are ok again! :) Our madness is just for a few mins and that's it.. I think it's a good sign... :)

Reached the zoo at noon time and we started off by queuing up for the admission.. Teddy bear is hungry and I drew out my strawberry pocky and we shared as we waited... The weather was good in the beginning.. but thank god that teddy bear suggest buying the admission as well as the unlimited tram rides.. we had never expect that it will rain so heavily at 4plus in the afternoon... if not we will be drenched like a muslim couple that we saw along the way when we were happily enjoying the sheltered tram ride under the rain.. we both reacted the same way when we saw that chicken soup couple..."Aiyo! So wet! Poor thing! " and we laugh out loud... lol... so bad hahaha!!! I suddenly have this wild idea... "Shall we be like them? Walk and hold hands in the rain together? That's so romantic right hee!!" He just laughed and shook his head, probably thinking that I am "suka".. well, this is me that we are talking about right? lol... And I should know that having showers under the rain will messed up his hair.. I forgot that Teddy bear is indeed a very vain boy... hahaha...oops!

I have to say that the animals today are so weird la... elephants shower themselves with the sand on the ground, otters willingly to take photo shots with different poses at different directions, the gibbon opens its legs like opening coffee shop, female lion posing and smiling when taking photo shots, all white tigers acting brave and swim in the water together, polar bear trying to squeeze itself in between two rocks in the water and swimming backstrokes, cheetah not bothered and sleep like an asthma patient, rhino eating its own dung, and leopard walked to and fro the same track mcm walking more to lose weight... ALL ARE SO MCM FAHAM LAH!! goodness sake!! haha.. but we enjoyed laughing at these animals.. and that chicken soup couple hahah...

Had dinner at AMK hub and went jalan-ing at Yishun hub together... So happy day for us...We took alot of pictures and planned to developed them and create our little album soon... I look forward for more outings with Teddy Bear!! :)

Hilarious Exploration with Sayang!

2008-11-17T07:53:00.001-08:00

Wad a nice Monday after the boring lessons esp the QM tutorial... omg the tutor kinda playing debate sessions la... "what i am trying to bring about the key implications is... ... so what i am trying to say is... ..." wth, there's no definite answers la... "come on, jus throw us the answers n we call it a day man..." lol.

After class, went to explore the new Yishun Hub with Sayang... thanks for uploading my big big pic in yr blog ah? ahaha... walked around to see e shops for a while and we went to the halal sakuran thai and chinese cuisine for our dinner.. yum! pricing were alright.. i had mee goreng and a lime juice and sayang had fried kway teow and bandung... hmm, n we shared the hotplate tofu.. ambience is nice and quite spacious... ahah.. i requested for a booth seat.. both if us sat at a 6-seater booth seat la.. big butts right ahahaha... after dinner we crazily tried to explore the link from Northpoint to Yishun Hub.. "we shall try again ok?" Sayang burst out laughing ahaha!!!

After which, we went to Watsons cos Sayang wanted to buy some face moisturizer.. in e end, she bought facial wipes and face mask.. sayang holding on to the clean & clear and watsons housebrand facial wipes thinking which one to choose.. Here i go again with my marketing philosophies ahaha... "e house brand is worth e money as compared to clean & clear. u see, house brand 20pcs cheaper than clean n clear 10pcs leh.. tis is e way they try to promote their house brand... to retain customer loyalty and retention..." ok, tis is random la... my yaya papaya quotes ahahah... then, we moved on to another shelf where i saw johnson&johnsons baby wipes... hahah... this is more fun la.. "liyi, are u trying to suggest me to use these baby wipes for my face? lol..." "ahaha come on sayang... this is much more cleaner! lol.. can clean body also, like a baby... u will feel like the skin of a baby!" we burst out laughing again... walked again and i saw disposable underwear LOL!!! n i thought tt it was another brand of facial wipes ahahaha... sayang was giggling and i walked away also.. if not, sooner or later the ppl will drive these 2 crazy women out with their broom lol... still considering if i should buy the silkygirl black eyeliner ahaha... $5.90.. cheap but i am still considering if it is a need or a want- marketing concept again... ... ... sayang was saying,"eh, u think u buy car meh? it's only $5.90 n not $590 ok... lol" hahaha.... (i'm still considering..)

I cant believe that a simple trip to watsons can make us so hyper and happy la... perhaps i was quite happy these few days... had some plans in mind... hee... first stop will be an outing wif him to the zoo... hmm... finally we can spend some time together soon after these busy days at work and in school... i want to see pony, polar bear, penguin, and elephant!!! oh gosh, i sound like a kid ahaha... has been a LONG time tt i haven been to e zoo liao... look forward to this day!!! :)

Tears of Love

2008-11-13T08:47:00.000-08:00

He sent me home. We had a talk together at the bench... things happened at the wrong time... how both of us wish that we will know each other earlier, so that things wont be like that now... how long will i hold on? when will the problem be settled? he din wan to hurt me either.. what we really need is time... but our emotions ran faster than the time as we wait... I cried... he took out the second hankerchief from his pocket.. this time was a pink n white one... i realised how a gentleman he is... to offer me a hankerchief when i cried... and kissed me on the forehead to appease me to stop crying...

I told him what I love about him.. all that i said were not things that he treat good just towards me.. however are the tiny-winy little care and concerns and attitude that he has towards the people around him... taking care of people's needs and sacrifice himself to make people happy... "When I see people happy, I will be happy also.." I just love you for who you are... His tears ran down when I told him about how I felt.. He cant stop his tears flowing.. I wiped his tears around his eyes that flowed down his face...and he hugged me... Don't cry ok? If no one loves you, I will love you... remember, God loves you too...

I'm glad tonight that we speak our feelings out... and he said to me... "You will be alright.. nothing will happen to you ok.. cos God loves you, Angel.."

I dont know what to say to him... and we cried this moment together...

Wow customers!

2008-11-07T09:29:00.000-08:00

Started work at 6pm today. Went early to take my dinner at the restaurant before starting work. Mr Nice Guy is sick... They made him go to see a doctor at a nearby clinic. I'm worried actually.. but in front of colleagues i tried to act as normal as i can be.. as in, not to show tt worried face.. He looks a bit pale in the face.. he got a fever, headache and skin infection... my poor little thing... you must take lots of rest ok... it's actually ok that he dont send mi home and go home early to rest.. but he still insisted to send me home... we didnt have supper cos i dun want him to stay up even later... why is he still so nice to me even though he is sick and he needs more rest? he really loves me?

Today had lots of reservations.. endless of them... omg! first time do recept till so busy... the whole dining area is filled with customers.. some were even encouraged to sit at the lounge area instead cos dining area was really packed... I was so surprised that Nad and Naz came to visit and be our customers hehe... aiyah sayang, i know wad u thinking la.. u came to see Mr Nice Guy right? still wanna order spicy pork lollipops!! dun forget u r muslims hor hahahah... cant stop laughing when i see both of u la... happy to see you guys here... oh my! n guess wad? after u guys left, Annie Tan and her bf is here also!!! That Annie Tan that lecture and tutor us Marketing Management!! hahaha... she still rem me man...

A.T: "oh, U r working here? U haven graduate right?"

Mi: (smiling) [isnt it obvious? duh... lol...]

Ok, gotta sleep liao... my little teddy pls rest well ok... take your medicine alright?... ... (kiss yr forehead~smile...)

Happy Moments!

2008-11-06T09:30:00.000-08:00

This week has been a quick one... back to school for boring lessons, doodling on daph's and nad's notes as usual, talk and copy answers in tutorials... well, week 1 only ma.. wad do u expect? lol... but i supposed these practices might take some time before we really get back to our hardworking self... hahaha.... Wah, Babie damn chio now... i like her style... thank god that her attitude still tame like her usual self hehe... later she too wild i cant take it how? wth...lol.

Besides school, has been working at the restaurant at night after school lessons... usually end at 10pm... Jacq told mi that i will be receptionist for about 2 weeks... cos for e time i am the newbie there and will be on the floor as server once the new ppl come after 2 weeks... ok la, just treat it as a more relaxing work load for mi... i believe that practice makes perfect. my rollups has been improving..yay! all in equal rolls, lengths are right... Mr Nice Boy is still very nice to me.. despite being tired panda working for long hours since mornings, he still insist to send mi home, just because to see mi for a longer time and to see mi home safely... thank you... :) i'm veri touched by you, seriously...

Has been a bit naughty this Tue morning cos i deliberately missed tutorial and went to ICA Building with Mr Nice Boy...:) sorry la babes... i know u guys must be kinda shocked to know that this is only the first week and yet Miss Angeline is skipping class lol... thank god tht it was mike cheong's class. he assumed that everyone is present and class rep Alloy kept mum about it too.. hehe... thanks man...

Had a great discussion with my Entrepreneurship proj team~ Serene, Shihui, Beepeng and Babie Daph... got so many wild imaginations omg... candy house la, cookie making la, teddy bear la, sahara desert n laser quest with a walk-in clinic (there's a reason for the clinic cos "we care") , shark spa and porcupine scrub, n squid ink leg mask hhahah... exfoliates and wadever wth... this is crazy!!! hahahahahaha..........

Had another little roti prata advertising discussion with Huiwen, Hazel, Huiqi, Jimmy and Alvin. This is more lame haha... Jimmy being the roti prata man, Alvin the oil, Huiwen the dough, Huiqi the strawberry, Hazel the chocolate and me the cheese. i'm all in black and yet i am the cheese? "chao seng" cheese?? lol. aiyah... class ma.. its ok to lose a bit of pride to do stupid stuffs hahaha..

Oh ya.. how can i forget to talk about the "Naz No. 2" at NYP Library Cafe?? haha.. sayang, u know la ah?? hahaha... why din you wave at him with sparkling eyes? grab his attention ma! since he really resembles yr Naz heheh... someone still trying to act stern at the lift and controlling not to laugh... hahah... mcm faham... onlyu girls will know wad happen there ya? keke... hahahaha, i cant stop laughing man... unstoppable "suka"... lol.

More jokes? Next week alright... jus these few is enough for this week hahaha... nights everyone...

Christians and Roman Catholics?

2008-11-01T23:10:00.000-07:00

Ever since I know him, I came to ponder on our differences in our believing towards God. Since I have some time to surf the net before I head to church for choir and dance, I have searched through the net and try to find the answer for myself. Cos it seems like not much ppl can tell me the real differences between a Christian and a Roman Catholic.. I dun grudge anyone on this, cos i cant answer myself too. That's e reason why i decided to find an answer on the net.. and it really helps... here it goes:

Is there a difference between
Catholic and Christian?

Q: "Is there a difference between being Catholic and being a Christian?"

our A: There are many Christian denominations and churches: Catholic, Presbyterian, Methodist, Baptist, Lutheran, and so on. Being a member of one doesn't determine whether a person is a Christian.

The real issue is whether the person individually has Jesus Christ living inside of him or her...if they actually have a personal relationship with God.

In the Gospel of John, we are told, "to all who received him [referring to Jesus], to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God."¹ Why do we have to become children of God? Because until then, God is distant. We may know he's there. We may know we are supposed to worship him. We may even know that in times of need, he's the one to pray to. But there is a distance we are aware of, and it is because of our sin.

Now, as long as we live and breathe, guess what, we're going to sin. We're going to do things our way instead of God's way. But our sin need not remain a barrier between us and God. Here's how.

The Bible says that there is a penalty for sin, and it might be greater than you'd expect. The penalty for sin is death. It's not just the penalty for sins like murder. It's God's judgment against any and all sins. The Bible says, "For the wages of sin is death..."² So that we would not have to die eternally separated from God because of our sin, Jesus died in our place. He fully paid for our sin. And offers us complete forgiveness. Not temporary forgiveness. Even for the sins we will commit in the future, we can have his forgiveness now, because Jesus died for all of our sin. We can immediately begin a close, personal relationship with him, that barrier of sin being gone. It isn't that we become perfect and no longer sin. But we become forgiven when we see that Jesus died for our sin, in our place.

"Yet now God in his gracious kindness declares us not guilty. He has done this through Christ Jesus, who has freed us by taking away our sins. For God sent Jesus to take the punishment for our sins and to satisfy God's anger against us. We are made right with God when we believe that Jesus shed his blood, sacrificing his life for us."³

When we receive Jesus Christ into our lives, God declares us "not guilty" and he says that we are now "made right with God." Our relationship with God has begun in a real way, where we no longer know God is "out there," but instead we know that he lives inside of us. We have God's forgiveness, a relationship with him. "For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord."⁴

^{___________________________________________________________________________________}

I had further found the facts to further explain the differences:

In the 16th century, during the Protestant Reformation, many faith groups split away from the Roman Catholic Church. This destroyed the relative unity of Christendom in western Europe. The Protestant movement further fragmented during the following centuries. At the present time, there are over a thousand Christian denominations in North America alone, in addition to many thousands of independent, unaffiliated congregations, para-church organizations, and personal or couple ministries. Although there are many mainline and liberal Protestant faith groups, most are conservative in nature.

Some beliefs of the Roman Catholic church and conservative Protestant denominations are in opposition to each other. Examples are:

	The acceptance of the theory of evolution by the Catholic church, and the continuing rejection by most conservative Protestants.
	The acceptance of homosexual sexual orientation -- but not same-sex behavior -- as morally neutral by the Catholic Church, but not by many conservative Protestants.
	The rejection of the death penalty by the Catholic church, and the continuing acceptance and promotion by most conservative Protestants.
	Catholics place ultimate interpretive authority in the Pope and Magesterium. Conservative Protestants place it with the individual Christian and his/her interpretation of the Bible.
	Catholics teach that the bread and wine during the mass becomes the actual body, blood, soul and divinity of Jesus. Protestants generally regard the two components as symbolic of Jesus' body and blood.

The gap between the two groups appears to be increasing over time. Future reunification of the Christian religion appears impossible.

Both Catholics and conservative Protestants generally agree on some major theological matters, like the existence of angels, Mary's virgin conception; Jesus' sinless life, incarnation, crucifixion, bodily resurrection, and his imminent return of Jesus to Earth in the second coming; Heaven, Hell; the Trinity, and the deity of Jesus. They agree that his execution brought about atonement -- the potential to bridge the gulf between humanity and God caused by sin. However they disagree on how this was achieved. They partly agree about the significance of baptism, but disagree about the timing when it is normally performed. They do not agree on which books are included in the official canon of the Bible.

Perhaps the main difference between conservative Protestantism and Roman Catholicism is expressed by the "five Solas". "Sola" means "alone" in Latin. The first three Sola statements of the early Protestant movement stressed that:

	"Sola Scriptura:" The Bible is the sole authority for Christian beliefs and practices. The Catholic Church stresses a balance between Biblical support and the tradition of the Church itself.
	"Sola Gratia:" One is saved through grace alone, given to the believer by God directly. The Catholic Church stresses the importance of church sacraments as a channel for God's grace.
	"Sola Fide:" Salvation is by the individual's faith alone in trusting Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. Again, the Catholic Church stresses the importance of church sacraments.

There also exists a great gulf between the two groups on other matters of belief and church practice -- particularly with regard to the rapture, authority within the church, church organization, freedom of the individual, freedom of each congregation, etc.

I am still searching more for the differences... more to come...

Y10~ 10th Anniversary!!!

2008-10-27T01:10:00.000-07:00

Whoo!!! Great job everyone who participated in Y10's 10th Anniversary!! 25th October 2008... not all dancers dance this time... but i believe that in God, we are improving every single time we step on to the stage! :) Amen...

Kinda like a few things to rejoice:

1) Limei laoshi (our tambourine dance teacher) jus gave birth to a baby boy! 48cm. 2.something kg. hee...

2) Yitong laoshi starts giving out red eggs and ang ku kueh to us cos its his new born baby's one month celebration!!!

3) Jialing laoshi and brother Si Kee are gave me wedding invitation card liao.. wedding on 22 November 2008!! YAY!!!

4) Of course for Y10's 10th Anniversary!! We all did well and I got to see Sister Xinmei again!:)

5) Becky told mi that I slim down in the morning service... My sis says I slim down in the afternoon service... Uncle ChinYee and Auntie Yuzhen say I slim down after the service in the evening... hmm! rejoice? YES!!! keke...

Here's some pics to showcase that night at Orchid Country Club, Y10's 10th Anniversary:

We are the dancers of the night...

Just smile la ok...

Trying to act cool poses?? Not bad heh?...

Dont mess with us.. or else u will get knuckle sandwich from our tambourines... lol.

We are thankful to "lao da" cos we became her "disciples" lol...

Dancers can be rough too ok... look at the way we sit...??? believe it ornt?? hahaha

Friendship or relationship?

2008-10-25T10:00:00.000-07:00

Dear friends, do you think it is better to keep as friendship or become into a relationship? hmm... i think tat friendship is better right? at least u can still maintain good relations with e person. on e other hand, i felt that if get into e relationship, things might get sour one day and u n e person may not be friends again... true??

Sigh.. i understand that I have been single for some time.. and that e phobia sometimes still exist.. however, i always motivate myself to open up and widen the social circle around me...yes i did... and i prayed alot to God about it... somehow it seems like God answers. and this time i am not really ready yet for a new relationship...

His relationship with his gf turned sour cos of distant relationship... and from wad he said, he is planning to stay here in Singapore n not going back. he tried many ways to tell me that he likes me..i felt that too.. but i am bothered about his gf... wad will he do to her? is it gonna be unfair?? i told him not to hurt anyone's feelings.. including his gf. cos if he is really planning to stay here, he should try to settle things with his gf. perhaps a break up? cos they wont see each other anymore unless if he goes back or his gf comes here. also, not to hurt me cos i dun wanna b hurt again... is he serious about us??? is he treating me as a replacement?? well, we jus started this friendship.. and i dun wan to lose it... i think it is better to be friends first right?? get to know each other more n see how... i have e feeling that he is still unsure although he confessed to me and that everyone can see that he likes me... let the time tell... and i hope that he can settle his side's problem before coming to me... sigh...

Busy busy... ...

2008-10-18T20:55:00.000-07:00

Phew! This week has been kinda tired for me.. not much time to blog bout what happen.. some friends might be asking, "hey, why never update your blog huh???" Apologies. Too busy and tired with work.

I worked straight for 4 to 5 days split shift, 12-4, 6-10, and full shift 2-10... the workplace has become like a second home of my own... Although work are repetitive-welcome, serve, take order, quality check, refills, clear up, greetings... I am learning that I am improving every single day...:) Jacq and Carol taught me on how to use the Micros for keying orders. not really good at it but has been putting my best in trying in order for myself as well as the kitchen people to understand. Business were slightly less busy these few days, and I realised that the kitchen has somehow quieten down too... usually when i enter the kitchen, i will def hear Ruby's voice, " Chix caesar! Down fries! One order!" And Lisa will respond, "OK!" haha... yesterday, Ruby taught me a funny lessen~ lifting the tray like lifting weights.up, down, left, right...lol. train my muscles. but seriously, I think Ruby is a very nice manager. She will only scold if you really do wrong things, and she will explain in a nice way. Not like "some manager", scold u in a sarcarstic manner when she is in a bad bad mood. "Oh, how I wish I can work night shift all e time so I dont have to see your face." (cos she is day shift most of e time haha) "Oh and yes, you have said that it is a high class restaurant. so everything has to look good. hmm, so I think it is really unglam for you to always place a can of your diet pepsi at the lounge station where every customer can see once they enter the restaurant ya???" Well... I am not the manager. No rights to say those things. Up to you lo. Not my problem la, but it jus makes my eye sore lo... hahaha...

Oh ya, during one of the off days (Tue), I went for Zee's hiphop class at Jurong. Thanks for inviting me there! Before the class, mi nicky, daphy babie, zee and yeeshan went for ice cream waffle at gelare. Yummie! A great chill out before the dance. Taken some pics but will upload them soon. Please bear with me for a few more days ok. its gonna be a few busy n tired days again for me cos i apply off for my birthday hehe... will be back on Tue for work. wah lao... Tue work opening. it means that I cant stay out late on my birthday... thanks to that "someone" who arrange my schedule la hur!

Last night off work with Clement at the same time and went for supper with him. He was so damn hungry OMG! haha... he had a burger, fries, drumlets, large drink, taro pie and hershey pie... and still saying tt its not enuff OMG! lol... eat more la u so thin haha. later on Jinky and Jessica came to join us. Wanna chat with them for a while cos their last day of work will be on my birthday and they will have to go back to Philippines to cont study... aiyah.. will sure miss them. thought of buying them a lil farewell present later and bring it down to give them tonight at the restaurant... :) So after the supper, Clement sent me home in a taxi. whoah... it is really so expensive to take a cab in the night le... must pay back Clement some.. oh ya, and thanks to allan for being so worried and concern if i have reached home safely haha... had a good sms chat wif him til 3am this morning, and he still got morning shift today... ... hope he dun be a panda and cut his fingers in the kitchen ya... haha.. if not i will have to put plaster for him as i have promised lol.

Ok... going out to buy Jinky n Jessica's farewell presents and later got singing practice and then dance practice with the kids at sunday school.. sigh.. so tired brother thomas n ah fon went to KL, didi went to Anna's house... past few days only me and mummy at home... mummy working tonight so i will be alone after dance practice... anyone meeting me tonight? fuancake is it? hahaha...

Birthday wishLIST:
-a good health
-nice friends to keep my life going
-good results for the last sem
-good results for didi's psle
-cont to serve god with my voice and dance
-more pretty and slimmer
-hav a caring and respectful boyfriend! lol...

er, is it too much?? hahah..

My Beloved Baby ever... ... I love Maomao...

2008-10-09T01:08:00.000-07:00

Bunster gave mi the permission to steal some pics of Little Maomao to upload here and share with you guys... I am sure you guys will love him! Happy 2nd Birthday to Maomao and Happy 20th Birthday to mi soon...

~Maomao~

Do you think he looks like a Korean babie?? I love his fringe... after his milk from bed...

Hmm.. nibbling his little finger... must be watching Sesame Street??... ...

Oops! Did something happened?? Is it a shock??...

Oh... Maomao is feeling tired... is he sleeping soon???

"Not to sleep yet... I wanna finish watching Sesame Street first! dun disturb mi ok?"

Will my babie be as cute as Maomao??... ...

Friends... ...

2008-10-06T08:13:00.000-07:00

Had off day today... met Claris and Jas in Orchard for dinner... went to M1 to enquire on some bills stuff.. cos Mum is unable to pay them again n our lines were being cut off again... sigh... this month's bills together with the instalment plan bills totalled to $200plus... I dun have so much to pay, leaving the M1 store with disappointment... but.. i really dunno wad to say to Jas... she helped me with the bills... i felt thankful, and at the same time feeling a burden to her... In my whole life I have never borrowed such a large amount from anyone, including my family members. but Jas insisted to help me... Jas, thanks so much... I must faster work and pay u the money, i promise.

Had dinner at Breeks with them.. I chose a cheapest and healthier choice (stated as a heathier choice pyramid in the menu) main course.. it was wonderful! add a dollar and can get soup of e day and a dessert... worth it man... midst of dinner, dunno why they laugh so much... is it cos i pretended to talk like a Filippino? "Will u girls [stop] laughing?" lol... ... it doesnt matter anyway haha... after dinner Jas went for her tuition and both mi and Claris went for a walk along Orchard road... walked about but dunno where i walk cos i am a moron in direction esp in Orchard hhaha...

Claris suggested either a drink or a pool game.. in end i chose a drink.. but no lor.. it was "drinks" instead of "drink"... lol. dropped by at IndoChine and had 2 half pints of Carlsberg during their happy hour... sat at the high chair directly in front of the band... 3 men in e band looked more like a Malay band cos they have strong Malay accent haha... the one in the centre of the 3, I hate his hair and cap hahah... look like a clown... and Claris noticed his "PEPSI" shirt. promoting Pepsi? oh gosh.. reminds mi of work.. pepsi with a lemon slice... hahah.. am i workaholic? had a few pics wif Claris... hmm, wondering which pics shall i post? haha.. all ba... thanks ar Claris.. we shared 2 glasses and in e end u drank half and i gulped down the rest huh... feel warm man... i think i got beer rash hahah... that's so weird, got drunk by milk yet not by beer, but got beer rash hhahah... well, knowing limits, thou shall not be drunk!

Pics here:

Gulping... burp!

Stop licking lol!

Hellow!!! hehe...

Gone case... rashes liao... thanks ar...

So many funny conversations...

2008-10-04T11:02:00.000-07:00

It happen so funny again but with another person, trying to be nice to me... haha...

M: "Angeline, where do you live?"

A: "Yishun.Why?"

M: "Ha, I live in Marsiling. Want to wait for me? I give you a ride home.."

A: "Ha, are you a safe rider?"

M: "Well, if you trust me... Next time I will get a helmet for you and fetch you to work k... " (smile)

A: " Haha... alright..."

It happen that this someone who wants to apply as a bf of mine talked to me again... lol...

G: "How old are you?"

A: "I told you, I'm 20..."

G: "That's so young... wait for me ok?"

A: "Haha... you must be kidding..."

G: "Why?"

A: (shakes my head) ... ... ...

And so, this man who often smiled at me made me felt weird...

E: (stopped me in the arm) "You going home?"

A: "Ya, I'm going home now... (wanted to go but was being stopped)

E: (din wanna let me off... wad the...)

A: "Why? I want to go now..."

E: "Ok.." (smiled)

Working is so damn fun... tips again!!! yayness... :)

Another funny conversation...

2008-10-03T10:37:00.000-07:00

Had a short shift today... another funny conversation took place:

G: "Hey Angeline, you have a boyfriend?"

A: "Erm, no."

G: "Really? No boyfriend?"

A: "Ya."

G: "So, can I apply?" (face so paiseh)

A: "Huh? Er, no." (walked away)

~haha... jus for laughs~

good night.

Claris' Birthday Chalet~ Downtown East

2008-10-01T09:54:00.000-07:00

30 Sept was the first day of the chalet... thank god that Carol n Jacq gave mi 2 days off so that I can make it to the chalet... but, hahaha... i did such a bad thing... i fooled on Claris... I smsed her n lied to her that i cant make it for her birthday chalet n BBQ cos my managers put mi to work till 10.30pm ( for the fact that i am already having 2 days off lol)... i think the contents of the sms was kinda sad n disappointing for Claris... cos it is her 21st birthday and yet "i cant make it" (like real!)... hahaha... of course she sounded sad la... haha.. i cant wait to see her shock n surprised face...

Met Jas n Flor at the chalet itself after that 1.5 hrs journey... sit bus til my butt aches haha... came kinda late cos i only started packing one hour before going out of the house... reached the chalet and helped to do up the balloons and "FUANCAKE" banner, also the last touch up on her birthday presents... wow... wad a rush... cos Claris smsed Jas so early n we thot that she has already reached Downtown East! we clear and scream n scream as we clear... real messy hahah... too excited too cos Claris (limelight of the day) doesnt know that both me and Flor turned up for the chalet... both Flor and mi hid in the room and tried not to move or make a sound... saw Claris' shadow at the balcony but too bad, she din even walk into the room when she reached... all she did was like a "ganjiong bee" at the BBQ pit at the balcony... in e end we surprised her at the balcony sliding door... i wonder if she is pissed? haha i dun care.. all she said is, "thanks ar..."~sacarstic man... lol.

had a great BBQ night with Claris' relatives and siblings... busy de-shelling the prawns to feed the birthday girl... thanks ar... i should have de-shell the prawns with my mouth then all will be mine hahah... finally everyone knows her nickname liao haha... happy for u le keke... went out in the midnight with Claris for a walk at the little pavement (to n fro, to n fro lol)... had a chat wif her heart to heart... Thou shall not disclose wad we have said... kinda distracted by a cat(dunno from where) and a drunk Indian man in one of the chalet rooms.. the man was like saying, "hello, the sun is shining brightly today... come and say...blahblah..." i suddenly felt like a comic strip, with 3 lines at the temple of my head.. cos it was a midnight, since when did midnight have a sun??? ok... haha...

Morning woke up and sent zhongyue and weisian to the taxi... had subway sandwich as brunch and then went for cycling at pasir ris park.. wow, realised that my stamina was kinda powderful after that tormenting training at the night cycling tt time and the long distance cycle with Sayang at Upper Thompson... this little cycling was no kick man... along the way saw a horse riding area... went to take some pictures with Flor and laris' sister, Cheryl... not take pics with em but with the cute horses hhahah... more pics will be uploaded soon... had dinner at pastamania with Jas, Claris and Cheryl... i will nv leave out my favourite creamy chicken linguine... yum yum!!! went to arcade with them and played a "brainless" game with Jas ("Lay an Egg") so that we can collect the tickets and exchange for something haha... who cares about the game so as long as we get the tix? lol. got about 200 tix and exchange for 2 disney table mat and coastal sets...:)

Claris sent mi to the bus stop after my shower at the chalet.. whoo! i love the toilet at the chalet, water damn shiok! so i washed up before going home... took another 1.5hrs back home in the bus... ache again man...

K... tml split shift... 12-3 n 6-1030pm... gosh! another tiring day for mi liao... night!!!

Oh ya... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SISTER ANNA AND YAOLIANG!!!

Work! Tips!

2008-09-29T10:24:00.000-07:00

Went for work again today... had training with Carol and she offered me a Chilli Soup cup... onions, mince beef and kidney beans... not bad... i ate 3/4 of it... learnt about nachos, chilli nachos, buffalo wings, potato skins, calamari rings... ...

After then, Jacq placed me to learn from Clement at the floor... seriously, i still prefer lounge with Joanne haha... Joanne jus reminds mi of Bloody Mary keke... learning from Clement is kinda tough though he is my fren cum colleague... in work he is real focus.. i almost got pissed a few times cos he is really mean when he talks to mi about work... sianz... but afterall, not that pissed cos he shared the tip with me hahaha... tips le... forget bout all the scoldings then haha...

That's about it! And ya... pls note this,

"HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY TO CLARIS TAN FUANCAKE!!! CHEERS!!!"

Lounge work!

2008-09-26T09:17:00.000-07:00

Whoohoo! today had my training at the lounge with Joanne as my laoshi... Joanne is a veri nice lady... friendly and helpful... she really helped me alot...

Lounge and dining area was different... i enjoy my time at the lounge, and also helping joanne around... joanne taught mi alot... differentiating the beers, glasses used, bloody mary, fruit punch, gerandine juice, white wines, red wines... also, the customers at the lounge are more easier to serve. in a way, they are more friendly and i felt like i talk to em like frens... most of e customers are foreigners and are veri friendly! i love them! they still thank me for the service. I felt so great!!

Alright, time to shower and get some rest... oh gosh! jacq is going to test me on mon!!

New working life!

2008-09-25T10:49:00.000-07:00

Wow... it's been 2 days that i'm working night shift... kinda tired.. but i'm feeling so much happier there.. thanks to clement for recommending me the job... the people there are nice to me... there's ruby (regional manager), carol & jacq (managers) & migan (going to be manager), lily, keiji, clara, eugene, emman, gerard ( saved mi with his tie), joanne (bar pro), jinky, jessica, faizal, puspa ( my teacher today), yan (one of the chefs that gave me so much tasting) and of course clement (bartender)!!!

So much to do even though they are simple jobs... like reception, answering calls, serving menus, glasses of water, BREAD BASKETS, doing rollups, making ice tea, coffee, tea, beverages with garnishes, making balloons ( i bursted one today oops!), refilling condiments, clearing... bread baskets are simple but i just somehow scared i will leave out some others... weird mi... made many bread baskets... more to come! jiayou!!!

A little conversation took place:

E: "Angeline right?"

A: "Ya..."

E: "Still schooling?"

A: "Yes, polytechnic.."

E: "Wad time are u knocking off?"

A: "10.30pm. You?"

E: "Same. Where do you live?"

A: "Yishun. You?"

E: "Br... (cant understand what he's toking hahaha)

A: (not really bothered cos its not my business anyway) " Oh ok..." (continued clearing the table)

E: "I shall go with you." (smile)

after some time...

E: "How old are you?"

A: "I'm 20. You?

E: "Make a guess."

A: "Hmmm... 26?"

E: "Ya, 26. Are you married?"

A: "No!" ( feeling quite a ridiculous qns)

E: "Do you have a boyfriend?"

A: "No. I just broke up not long ago."

E: "Oh, why?"

A: "Oh, he's a nottie boy."

E: "Oh, but I'm a good boy!" (smile and pointing to himself)

A: (walked away)

A: (walked past)... "What?" (embarrassed cos E was looking at A)

E: (smiled)

Knock off time...

A: (went off early without waiting hahaha...)

That's all folks.. Goodnight!

Meaningful to me... wad about you?

2008-09-23T07:20:00.000-07:00

我想唯有上帝和你知道整件事的始与终。
只有上帝知道你心里所想的一切，
只有上帝知道你现在的心情。

只要回头，悔改，生命依旧可以重来。
这是上帝的应许。

我们爱，因为神先爱我们。
这爱不会因为过犯而变小；
这爱是包容的爱。

只要悔改，只要原谅，生命依旧可以重来。
这是我相信的，
你呢？

I was browsing some of my frens' blog and I happened to drop by at Yenyee daoshi's blog... one of her posts, she stated these... I really find it meaningful.. and is something that really reminds me that I should learn to be forgiving and loving my enemies...

I have told her about my sorrows of my past experiences with my ex bf... but somehow, all that I said to her and my close frens were not really all that God understands...

So many bad memories... even though it has been 6 months to 7, and that he was my first love, I will never forget what he said to me when he broke my heart... To you, you may feel that I am just one of your games, and perhaps was the shortest games that u had... u gain so much and i lose so much to you...in fact, you have changed a lot of me in my life now... perhaps you had really forgotten about me, the way I smile, the way I cried to you in your arms, and the times we had together... but, I really have to tell you that, no matter how, you have already left this deep print in my heart... U stepped into my life and left nastily, leaving mi weeping with tears... I will not forget... But, I'm gonna let you know. Be it whether u see this post ornt, I will still wanna say...

"I am going to leave u behind my back... I am trying my best to walk out from this and I will look forward for a better someone in my life... As for forgiving, yes, I forgive u for your nasty actions that I hated alot... but as for frens, I guess I shall put it that we'll see how the time tells...

I think I love you with regrets..."

Pre-paration for work!

2008-09-22T03:53:00.000-07:00

Slept kinda early last night.. one of the days that i slept so early in this hols... eyes were kinda puffy and dry... "need to go home and sleep", perhaps that's what vincent tells mi with his hand signals yesterday... "dun stress yrself out", that's what Jialing told me as she can see that my eyes are really tired...

Woke up from a beautiful sleep... dreamt that I had a big house, a swimming pool, a car, maids, and a wonderful husband... wow... so nice! its jus a dream afterall... but thank god for that dream... :) looking forward to the training tml... had bread and veggies soup in e morning... decided to cook by myself cos i am broke... opposite of my dream yeh? Sister-in-law went out with mi for a little neighbourhood shopping for my white top and black shoes... whoo... spend mi quite abit before i earn them hahha... cos i always wanted a pair of comfortable shoes... no blisters and no corns... which i had alot of blisters and 11 corns when i dance in the past... scary...!

Shoes are veri important... though that most of e times its so hard for mi to find shoes cos i have broad-based feet.. i see it as a important thing cos it brings you to many places to search for wonders, experiences and memories... alright... time to watch TV... and my favourite PPG tonight...

Disappointment... give up shall I?

2008-09-21T07:31:00.000-07:00

what a day... cried so badly... wad did i do wrong?

Was talking to little brother about his PSLE and at e same time wishing him good luck as exams are nearing... not even looking at mi but rather his homework, he told mi to shut up. is this a respect? i felt being offended. so my words tend to be kinda harsh on him... he continued looking away and ignored mi like the attitude of a typical "ah beng". gone case, he cant be changed... tts it...

Wad hurt mi even more was Mum... she reprimanded mi tt i should respect others if i want others to respect mi... but right now at this situation, wad's going on? did she know what happen? all she knows is hiding in the room with that old man. so can i say that by wishing ppl good luck for exams, in turn i was told to shut up? can somebody tell mi wad is wrong?

Well, side him since he is the youngest in the family... i dun have any rights to control him anyway... i am jus someone who is born 8 years earlier... so it doesnt matter much ya?? if one day he happens to turn into a rotten apple like i used to be, please pray hard that he will change for the better. dun blame me that i didnt warn u... i gave up.

Lucky mi...

2008-09-19T09:50:00.000-07:00

Today kinda lucky day for mi... went farming with Sister at Bishan area... half way through my stomach dunno wad's wrong... feel like wanna LS... oh gosh... every step when i walk felt like climbing mountain haha...

Then, Carol from Dan Ryans called!! YES YES YES!! "Hi, Angeline! i know you are expecting my call right? haha.." of course la.. i'm becoming mushroom soon if i still remain jobless... great! tue will be my orientation and wed will be the official working... YEAH!!!

Went safra swimming with my funny "missy" fren qianling... so shocked to know tt nurse like her can be so cool.. pierced her tongue!!! had jacuzzi for a while then washed up and went for dinner at coffeeshop... she wanna order heineken... i almost wanted it too.. but must save money... so i hand signed the auntie to go away ahahha... on e way home, got bird shit on my head!!! is this lucky or unlucky huh??? washed my hair again... wth... wonder wad will happen tml hahaha... i guess e bird shit is a sign for good luck??... ...

Pissed brothers day... n kinda disappointed..,

2008-09-18T08:51:00.001-07:00

Sigh... sometimes i just dun understand, why do younger brothers tend to say lies and leave their elder sister to wipe the shit from their ass... little brother was very childish today, even though he is maturing at this puberty stage.. yet, sigh... i kinda got maligned by elder brother for starting the stupid thing with the real fact that younger brother was the one who started first...

He is growing up, and now his hands are bigger than mine... his foot size is bigger than mine too... even his strength... he is so strong... tt i cant even control his strength and got "bullied" by him under his "power"/"energy"... so demoralized... i was so pissed off... my wrists are being squeezed hard and the red marks are the evidence... yet, i was still like being alleged to be the wrong party...

So pissed that i went to the park for a walk alone... walked for 10 bloody rounds... deep breath with each step... perhaps that can soothe me down better... well, a good exercise... then met Sayang for a chat at the coffee shop... talked and laughed like nobody's biz...though our drinks were green tea and not beer hahaha...

Received sms from "Hubby"... he might not be going for performance with me on Sat... cos he might be going to club battling with other dancers... sigh... wad can i say? i dun wanna force u either... jus hope that u can go wif me lo... if not i dunno who to go wif... sigh... i jus wanna see you... but it seems so difficult...

MAMMA MIA!!!

2008-09-17T08:05:00.001-07:00

Whoohoo!!! thanks to Jessilyn! She got a lucky draw prize of a pair of movie tickets from 8days... so she jio me for a movie to Lido Shaw House yesterday after my interview at Dan Ryans.. well, you can see the poster from here... we went to watch Mamma Mia!!! Preview man hahaha.... it was a mix of drama and musical... damn hilarious lol. i dun mind watching again... hehe...

The best line that i will never forget,

"I don't mind if you have slept with hundreds of men!"

Oh gosh!!! hahaha... Excellent movie!!!

hehe... got to contact with my dear Kenny "Hubby"... wonder when will he be free from his dance and we can go out take many many pics for our album??? i'm waiting kekeke... miss him man... :)

Job interview... waiting for results...

2008-09-15T09:46:00.000-07:00

Earlier on chatted with Clement... he recommended me to Dan Ryans for interview... wow, Clement has been there for like 3 years... thanks to him.. will i be Clement's disciple?? i must definitely give Carol a good impression of mi...

I was waiting patiently for the results to be out... somehow excited, worried, heart thumping... i wonder how will i do... the system was not working well... Kaydence was not bothered haha... Bestie was scared lol... Sayang hates the waiting time.. Huiwen damn funny la.. she tried closing ie and open with mozilla firefox.. i was telling her, "why not u jus shut down and restart the com haha.." kinda mean but i was jus joking hhahah... the system is lagging... saw a whole list of nyp ppl online... they must be waiting to get logged in too lol... so ganjiong!!!

First day guitaring @ Y10

2008-09-13T23:06:00.000-07:00

It has been quite some time that I did not play my guitar... fingers were not as flexible as before... was kinda worried tt i may play "zao sia"... came very early, first to reach... reached at 8am in the morning to practise alone at the cinema... finger tips are kinda painful and my left wrist start to ache... oh gosh... i guess i'm too nervous.. cos it was my first time playing for morning service at Y10...

Thomas and Yaoxing are good... they guided mi veri well... playing with them and yaoyong together as a group helped mi realised that it is important to have cooperation and rapport with one another... luckily i was standing next to Thomas (pianist), he is like a big brother... all e time available when i needed help into the "strumming" and "pai zi"... Letticia is very friendly... she is a mother, veri young... i like her features... she looked like a mix... her daughter, Meryl, so cute... rosey lips, i thought she put on lip gloss haha... wah, first time someone helped mi keep my guitar into my guitar case together. it was Letticia:) thank you!! she was amazed that i can guitar... cos so far i think i am the first girl in the church to play the guitar haha... Zhuohan and his gf Lynn was kinda surprised too... they say i veri "zai" and "cool", din know that i can play the guitar haha... really surprised? hey, not only guys can play guitar ok... lol. "jin guo bu rang xu mei"... ...

Hmm, I just realised that i like to challenge guys hahaha... last time in sec sch speech day, i was the first female parade commander. i believed that i can shout the commands as loud as the guys... in the end i did it... :) n who says that only guys can be good chefs? i can do it too man... this is chicken feet ok... i think my next bf will def love mi n my cooking haha... dancing? haha... i see that Peter, my dance choreographer, who started dancing at the age of 24, and yet he can practise so hard and become so flexible... if he can do it so can I!! i suppose that girls are more flexible... and under Peter's intensive training, i can finally do splits within half a yr... well, i dun really care about body size or wadsoever... so wad if i am bigger? there are also many Caucasians who can dance ballet, jazz, hiphop, etc... so what is there to be afraid of?? hehe... yep, and guitaring... this is not a guys thing ya... i am sure Sayang will have the same sentiments haha... cos we are guitarists... i wanna play my best... wanna learn as much from Yaoxing... and thanks to Yaoxing for the guitar strap... my "en ren" lol... this is never ending de... so, dun giv up on guitar!!!

Alright... time for a face mask and a short nap... meeting Daddy to his Korean church tonight... looking forward to another guitaring with Y10 musicians... for all e compliments that motivates mi to move forward!!! thank you guys!!!

Farming days... bible group... guitaring...

2008-09-12T10:48:00.000-07:00

Wow... perhaps at this point of time when i am jobless, i think i got some time to do some things which help mi to spend some time out of the house..

Went farming with Sister at Yishun area yesterday... we went to the blocks where we lived last time ( for more than 10 years)... the place brought mi and Sister so much good memories... the parks reminds us when we used to cycle and play candles and lanterns during the mooncake festivals... we talked n talked as we walked from one block to another... initially wanna go to Auntie Qiaoxiang's house to borrow her toilet.. tt was Sister's idea lol.. Auntie Qiaoxiang was our neighbour in the same block in Yishun... she always take good care of us just like her own kids... and her children treat us like their siblings... last time we used to go to church together too... and after services we will still have dinner together at the coffee shop downstairs... last time so happening! yup, in e end we only visited her at her doorstep, cos her dog ah... aiyoh, damn nottie, fierce and boh geh hahaha... but he barked too much la.. so we jus popped by to say hello to her... she was so busy with her grandson and tat boh geh dog... lol.

After the long farming, we went home for dinner together... Mum called Sister if we are coming home for dinner. we thot tt she is having off ytd. apparently, we realised tt she went for work when we came home. After dinner, I brought Sister with me to the bible group study. we were late, cos Mr Zhiwei was late and he wan us to tong pang him from junction 8 to Thomas and Wenfang's place. I felt comfortable going there, as this time Sister went wif mi... She told mi she wants to join them again and asked mi to meet again to attend the bible group study together... it has been some time tt Sister has not been going to church. Lately her sales are getting bad, she have not even close a deal ever since her wedding in June. She was worried and stressed and wondering if she should change a job... she shared with us about herself facing the sales downturn and she was hoping that God could help her by giving her some positive response... She did enjoy and feel tt it was a good time to get herself away from tt stress and a good place for her to rely on God... i am feeling glad for Sister...:)
____________________________________________________________________

Today, my throat was kinda bad.. doesnt have much voice like i usually do... i guess lately i has been sleeping late which may be the cause that made me feel kinda unwell... Sister called me again for help in farming. Today will be in Bishan, around Thomas and Wenfang's place. Initially, Sister asked mi to stay at home and rest, but i jus insisted tt i want to help her in farming. I was kinda pale when i met Sister, but thank God tht the weather was good, not humid, not rainy... breezy... no sun...:) we farmed for bout 20 over blocks, as usual, yakking n laughing like two mad women... and old uncles kept looking at us like some animals tt ran out of the zoo hahah...

After farming, Sister wanna treat me for dinner cos i helped her so much... i was so excited and was asking wad she is going to treat me... she said, " cai beng"... my reaction was like, er... cai beng... a bit sianz of rice all e time... but this cai beng was realli different, it tastes real good... at Toa Payoh Lorong 8...:) after dinner, Sister called Yaoxing and Zhiwei to meet up la kopi.. Zhiwei was busy wif work and Yaoxing was in church... oh i remembered, they got pract for sun morning service... so, Sister suggests tt we could go to church and see Yaoxing... ya, nothing important, just to see Yaoxing hahha.... so good frens... We went in and saw Uncle Francis and ziyu and many other brothers and sisters... then Uncle Francis asked me to join in guitaring... whoohoo... so sudden... so, for the enjoyment and idea of serving for God, I borrowed Rev Huang's guitar again... so... I'll be guitaring for this Sun morning service...:) dunno why, everytime i borrow Rev Huang's guitar, i always smell this sweet honey smell... i jus wonder why it smells like tis... hmmm...

Learning to guitar with them i realised tt i can learn quite a bit... cos got Yaoxing and Thomas to guide me... even though i cant really play well, but I hope tt God knows tt i am trying my best... yup, and thanks to Yaoxing ah... trying to make me busy... i dunno how to play some pieces and can still find a way to make mi play tambourine...and compliment tt i was good... haha... thanks thanks...:) whoo.... it was Uncle Francis' birthday... we had a short celebration together wif him and Rev Huang made a prayer of blessings for him... we mingled around with the food and laughed alot, sharing funny conversations.. hmm, baijie was another funny person. she can tok wif u everything under the sun hahaha... maureen and esther too...:) nice chat... Yup, especially to Uncle Francis, "A very Happy n Blessed Birthday to you!!! Jesus loves u always!!! So are we!"

i'm so fed up with u! u ruined my day!!!

2008-09-10T00:49:00.001-07:00

I jus dun understand, i dun understand why do u have to be so mean to me... showing me tt sort of face as if i owe u a $100 million... why do u have to be so angry with me? jus over a stupid pot of rice? i understand that rice prices are rising since some time... and that it is a waste of money if sister-in-law has cooked too much...but she din do it purposely...she is jus being helpful there... cant u open yr stupid eyes and take a look tt she is trying to help in some cooking to lessen yr burden??? i know it is my fault... i woke up late... u called me to remind her not to cook plain white rice cos u wanted to make nasi lemak for little brother... but i was too tired and i went to sleep again.. so sister-in-law was not aware of this message... but why din u in the first place call her yrself? why must i be the middle man to pass such message??? afterall it is my fault... fine, i will eat up that whole pot of rice... are u happy now???

You stepped into the house and start to make a fuss out of everything... throwing yr tempers around and slamming things on the floor and the table... imagining yourself to be a queen?? come on, i doubt so... you are not the only one in this whole world to have attitude and be angry... I am perhaps a "bastard", "burden" or "creature" in yr eyes... but, this "bastard", "burden" or "creature" has feelings too... cant u jus see more importance in us rather than that old man of yours??? i have already said sorry and it is my fault, and i will eat up tt whole pot of rice so tat u wont feel that it is wasted... so what more do you want? do you want me to pay you the loss in dollars and cents??? u will only talk nicely to me when you mention about that old man of yours... you will only give me money willingly when you needed me to help you get something for that old man... i know his birthday is on 11 Sept, so what? U can plead me to help you buy a cake for him... he is not my father, why on earth do i have to do such things for that old man of yours? You can sacrifice so much for him and yet you cant for us... dun u know that the time that you have spent for us has become so much lesser... even on yr off days, we wanted to bring you out.. but u rather spent yr time with that old man and his frens playing mahjong at home... and i have to inhale all that smoke from the old man's cigarettes... every week I have been waiting for yr off day to come, even hoping for a simple grocery shopping with u... but in the end, u ended up at home with that old man... have u been caring about how we felt? not at all... i felt that u doesnt care... all you know and care is that old man.

Alright, little brother is back. u never even ask him how he is doing in school. yet all these were asked by mi...u dun seem to take care of him well enough... all in yr head, "old man", "old man" and "old man "... let me make this clear...i will not appear myself on the day of yr old man's bd... i hate everything!

A Moment Like This...

2008-09-08T08:59:00.000-07:00

A moment like this, some people wait a lifetime...
For a moment like this, some people search forever...
For that one special kiss.. Oh i can't believe that it happen...
...... .......
Some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this...

Isn't this song wonderful? A Moment Like This by Kelly Clarkson... I'm so in love with this song... She is beautiful... Oh gosh, so many things running in my mind... happy n sad... so much memories... a kiss with your love one...aww... I wanna find the lyrics n score for this song... going to guitar for this song... if some guy can guitar this song for me, i will love him so much...:) when will this moment like this be??? can't wait for bible study... had missed it 2 times le... so busy all these while...

Went out with sister today... her hubby got a shopping voucher from his company, so he gave her... then we went to Button On... sister got me a pair of silver shoes and a lip gloss... silver shoes... I wonder so much... when will this moment be? the happiest moment in my life... sigh... a moment like this... ...

St James Power House

2008-09-03T18:37:00.000-07:00

i love vodka.

cheers for this holiday!

why so naked? lol.

am i drunk? haha...daphy's supporting mi...

Go St. James!!!

Last night was incredibly fun... it was ladies night... we had quite alot of enjoyment...

We went to St James Power House...whoohoo! the blasts of music make my ears go deaf for about half an hour... but the music ytd was good... and we got 5 free drinks cos it's e special privileges for ladies night... i got a vodka coke followed by a Heineken bottle... wow, amazing i'm alright and could still dance at the dance floor for bout 2 hours!!! I jus realised tt the guys there are quite agressive... initially i was dancing wif babie near the DJ area.. then this guy has been eyeing on mi for some time... but i din really care bout his presence... cos, he doesnt look appealing hahaa... after some time, he tapped on mi and asked mi for a dance wif him... "WTH! with you??? am i blind??? go home and sleep ah!!" lol. i rejected him. but he just kept coming near. irritating! wah! an angmoh suddenly take a shot of us with his camera from where he is standing on the top... perhaps we danced well! hehehe... it's been some time tt i din enjoy so much in dancing ever since i left danzinc... so, i'm gonna let myself out this night! After some time, we went for a toilet break... shiok after storing so much drinks in the bladder...

We then changed to another area to dance... as i was making my way through the crowd... a guy with veri nice smile smiled at me... so i smiled back lo... nothing ma... jus be polite la... cant be dao the whole night hahaha... then this botak angmoh (kinda old) spoke to us that he wanna stand in between us... hahaha... " WTH! u think u who ah??? go home and chang diapers la!!!"lol. we rejected again. he so humsup! i dun dance with humsup ppl lo... the guy who smiled at me seemed to come nearer... then babie held on to my shoulder... haha... protect me huh babie? hehe... a macho guy with small eyes nearby also eyed on us for a while... but he is still ok... we jus smiled:)

We ended dancing at bout 2am... left home by a cab... it was really fun! a good place to let out, laugh, and know that there are so much better guys out there... butbut... i still prefer tame guys... more security...no humsup! hehe...

Jobless girl...

2008-09-03T18:27:00.000-07:00

Sigh... this morning shihui gave me a call...it was a bad news... the toy car company did not want to hire me cos i cant work on sundays... jus this sunday thingy... a few more hours later i could start work, but it seems like i have been let down.. not by shihui but by the company itself... shihui kept apologizing... but i cant blame on her... in fact i should thank her for making the effort to look for a job for mi... thank you shihui... she said she'll help me to look for other jobs for the time... hopefully i can get one soon... and i will start sourcing for jobs again... perhaps i should try on Giordano...:)

Bills... Money... DRINK!!

2008-09-02T23:00:00.000-07:00

Early afternoon i woke up and started reading the letters....

M1 sent a letter... an instalment letter... cos Mum and me are unable to pay the amount on time, so they gave us an instalment plan so that we can still enjoy the services as we pay them bit by bit... but, this isn't gonna be bit... 3 figures... i dun wanna say, sigh... Sianz... another letter from SP Services... i realised the electricity bills are so much more expensive then water bills...for the month of August... 3 figures too... oh gosh... i'm not a gold mine... how to find these money???

I have to work hard... Have to help my mum with some... Planning not to go Thailand... cos it was cancelled... Brother need to purchase a new flat... so his parents-in-law agreed to hold the wedding dinner in Thailand at a later date... Wah... but the tickets are bought... Didi and Daddy's tickets... they cant refund them liao... well, take it as a holiday for them then... luckily I haven buy the flight ticket... Almost wanna buy it last week... lucky... if not i will bang the wall today... yep... Sister-in-law got her PR today... we are happy for her... Brother wants to treat us for dinner tonight... but i told him i'll be there if it is before 9pm tonight... cos... gonna drink tonight... ladies night... free drinks haha... wont spend for sure! drink to my woes... yum seng to my happiness... cant be home late too... working tml... jiayou!!!

Happy Teachers' Day...

2008-09-02T03:46:00.000-07:00

On Sunday, our Sunday School celebrates Teachers' Day... it was a memorable day for me... our nursery classes combined with the primary classes... they started off by a singspiration... cant believe that our nursery kids sang so much louder than those that are in the primary kids... good job babies!!! After then they had a short game... which is to stand on the pieces of paper when the music stops... they were given instructions on which parts of their body are to be placed on the paper and that only a maximum of 2 kids can share a piece of paper... the kids were so excited... they ran about in the hall and almost bumping into one another and shouting with joy... Some younger kids from our nursery did not join in the game... not cos the game is violent, but cos they are too small in size and they are afraid to be bumped down by other bigger kids... Little Dong Yu was too young and small too... but he enjoyed running about.. i held his hand and played the game together. But he is still a baby, and he doesnt know why he has to step on the piece of paper... so he moved away and looked at mi with his eyebrow lifted in confusion... haha...

It was art and craft time... the kids are supposed to sit into groups and make a little card for any of the teachers... i helped to distribute the crayons, glue and stickers to the little kids in my group... the best part being a teacher is to look at her students and observe their attention when they are doing their work... looking at how serious they are to the work, how they write their names and colour the work with the crayons, how they decide which stickers to choose and how they share the materials without having arguments... although most of the time they are in silence, looking at their creativity process reflects the childish innocence in them... i am so happy to be a Sunday School teacher...

I received 2 artworks from xi en & le en, zhe kai and jian hang...it was realli cute... yup, and surprisingly, ning xing held on to my hand and gave a card to mi... it was made by herself at home... in the card, she wrote with a pencil," to my dearest teacher, happy teachers' day! love, zhong ning xing." These are written in Chinese... i was so touched... most children dun write Chinese nowadays... but ning xing did... all in Chinese, including her own name! Thank you children...I love you...

Pastor gave each of the teachers a pencil case too.. i got a blue one... with an iron-on "follow jeses" tag... it was really nice too...:) it will definitely remind mi of staying close to God along my teaching path in the Sunday School...

We were all given a treat in Bethel Hall... Golden Pillow, KFC, beehoon, fruit agar agars, curry and many more.... it was really a wonderful day... not cos of the food, but especially the artworks and card that the kids had given mi... it is a priceless thing... and it meant alot! I will work hard!!!

New experience!

2008-08-30T08:19:00.000-07:00

I had a new experience... Went out with Sister Anna and joined her for her work... Not sure if I will get paid for helping her... but anyway, i learnt so much about property. :)

Yesterday, met her colleagues, Vera and Stella. we travelled to Wan Tho Ave to do farming for the condominium show flat in Carris Dale. Wah... all the rich people there... got so many dogs... Big big dogs.. so fierce... i was being frightened a few times as i was putting the flyers into each households' letter box... wah got one dog the face so black... stared at mi through the gates in silence... pervert dog haha... we passed Angsana Rd, Mulberry Drive, Butterfly Ave and many more... legs so pain with the heels... but it was really interesting... see many kinds of landed housing... damn new ones... damn old ones haha... some even the whole house made of glass... whoo!!! At night, helped Siser Anna to call other agents for co-broke in Compass Height... telemarketing skills again... but not as scary as the first time tt i did last time...

This morning, supposedly going to a road show with them at Little India... but Sister Anna last night got eye infection... so we din make it... Vera n Stella went over to the roadshow... Stayed at Sister Anna's place last night and helped her call agents for co-broke again this morning.. but today's are not Compass Height... today's are Yishun and Woodlands area... somehow... Yishun n Woodlands calls are easier and not as fearful... perhaps Compass Height is for condominium buyers... tt's why higher expectations... Went out with Sister Anna to meet her buyer- a middle aged couple... 2 viewings at Compass Height... wow... the swimmng pool damn big n shiok la... got wading pool, normal pool and jacuzzi pool... still got others like clubhouse, gym, tennis court... so many facilities... no wonder ppl living in condo not so easily bored... haha.... but, the apartments are somehow small... hmm... doesnt really appeal to mi... Sister Anna told mi i will sure love Grandeur 8 in Ang Mo Kio... hmm... looking forward to it...:) sister Anna taught mi some things to note when doing a viewing of an apartment... i learnt quite a bit... hmm.. perhaps i shall try doing property sales!!!

Yes, Shihui called mi... finally i got a new job... thank you Shihui! pay okok la... i will be doing promoting for F1 race toy car... will be Shihui's colleague... well, work this month first and see how... got to help my Mummy lessen her burden... so tight up in cash...

Bought Mummy a fruit cake to celebrate her bd... still waiting for the cake cutting... oh gosh, stupidly i din realise tt i ate 3 eggs in total today... felt so nauseous just now in the car... Mummy got mi strawberries!!! yum yum!!! alright, tt's about it!!! Cutting cake soon!!!

Plannings...

2008-08-26T07:27:00.000-07:00

Ok... Practically... I have been complaining to everyone that I felt like a useless bug tht's rottening at home... But, I managed to get something to do and make use of the time alone at home:

1) Sweep the floor
2) Mop the floor
3) Hang the laundry
4) Wash the dishes
5) Played the church CDs as i was doing those mention above
6) Packed my brother's game dvds.. and i saw PPG game... i was so attracted to it and stunned for bout 10 min hahah...
7) "Stone" for some time...
8) Planning wad to do for the next few days...

Ok, planned...

Wed: Going to someone's place to do something which i cant disclose for the moment... heheh

Thur: Meeting Babie and Sayang for Comex Show and COFFEE yeah... then meeting EMRS clique for farewell dinner for jul and kay...

Fri: Perhaps swimming, guitar for new songs or off to JB to shop! hehe...

Sat: Mummy's birthday celebration. supposedly should be Sun but she's working... hmm.. steamboat? planning with Sister Anna...

Sun: A special day for me cos i'm one of the "teachers" in the Sunday School... Teachers' Day celebration yay!!!

Next week??? More night plans with Babie and Ahlim... Waiting for Nicky to finish his exams and we will go makan and gossip!! and... Sentosa... I want tanning... hmm...babes want to go wif mi?? heheh....

Alright... off to fetch Mummy off from work! night night...

Who understands?

2008-08-24T22:36:00.000-07:00

Last night, i cried til 5am this morning... i believed it's just one of those days that I need to be alone... mum quarrelled with me... but i dont think that quarrelling with her is the main issue... it's jus me... me. After all these months, i felt happier... but not to the extent like last time when i almost overjoyed everyday and looking forward to each new day... Memories kept flashing... they just couldnt stop... How do i walk out from that world? Love, does it really exist? Is it a true love?

Bestie accompanied mi online for some time, he asked me to just cry out if i want to.. which will make mi feel better... yeah i did... cry and cry... for hours... with my doggie...

Babie asked me dun cry... i know you care and heartpain for me... but i just cant control it.. and i continue crying... sorry hor...

I din wanna worry Claris too much cos she schooling and need rest... dun worry k...:)

I cried til i tired then fell asleep... woke up in the afternoon... chatted with John, Bestie and Babie... Plannings with Babie to ladies night, comex show and sentosa... Bestie asking mi how i feel and we jus chatted randomly... John consoled mi... gave me a poem, a song and "footprints in the sand"... here it goes...

Poem:

Life is a sine curve
I'm sure most have heard
But to the equation
I give no affirmation

Things happen
It is just random
But when you wanna rant
Just add your friends

When you begin to slide
Get off your ride
Don't look down
But raise your crown

Mistakes we make
Promises we break
But that's part of the process
The one we must take

Wipe your tears
Stop comparing with peers
Learn to stand
Learn how you had bent

Brush yourself and forward you go
And the next time it'll take more than that blow!
---------------------------------------------------------
Song:

Before the world began,
You were on His mind.
And ev'ry tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes.
Because of His great love,
He gave His only Son,
Ev'rything was done,
So you would come.

Come to the Father
Though your gift is small,
Broken hearts, broken lives,
He will take them all.
The power of the Word,
The power of His blood,
Ev'rything was done
So you would come.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Footprints in the sand:

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,

other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed

that during the low periods of my life,

when I was suffering from

anguish, sorrow or defeat,

I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,

"You promised me Lord,

that if I followed you,

you would walk with me always.

But I have noticed that during

the most trying periods of my life

there have only been one

set of footprints in the sand.

Why, when I needed you most,

you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,

"The times when you have

seen only one set of footprints in the sand,

is when I carried you."

Ok... Sister called me... wanna me to go town with her... finally i can take my mind away for a while... frens, please msn mi regarding plans....

Feeling unwell.. yet made reflections...

2008-08-24T02:10:00.000-07:00

I woke up at 2.30pm... last night told yaoyong that i will go for the morning service...but, something's not right with my stomach this morning... so unwell... my tummy felt like drums... is it beer diarrhea? i think i had stomach flu... had diarrhea a few times already... tummy still aching... sigh... din manage to go for the afternoon service either... i am so unwell... this is jus the beginning of the holidays... sigh...

I was surfing the net and reading frenzies' blogs... saw sayang's blog... she posted a video of her composed malay song... meant for her boyfie:p

Sayang, i really love yr song! Although i din understand what the lyrics meant... but i heard a few words like "cinta ku" something like that... it really makes mi realise the power of love... initially after my first experience, i became so afraid of relationships and wanna jus be alone-single... but after i heard yr song, i reflected to myself and feel that it is time for mi to walk out from the world that i perceived to have nightmares from the previous relationship... last time, i dun believe in love... i felt that men toys with our feelings... i really hope that men wont be like this... i wanted to find a true love...

Yup, and Claris... thanks for calling mi last night and we shared so much... i think i really poured out alot to u on all my main problems... practically it's all about myself.. what's hidden in me... my fears of love... thank you for being there...:)

And Bestie, i remembered u telling mi that not all relationships are the same... a real love and a friendship is different... it's a different feeling... love is someone to love you for who u are... to be there and be with you... stand by you... care for u and dun expect any returns... and even accept you for your weaknesses and helping you to change for the better... it's really something that you cant feel it from a friendship... friendship is important too... i understand... thank you for sharing your woes with mi too... worry not as it is still within our walls...:)

Well, it's time that i should let it go and walk out from the world of nightmares... love... when will the true one be? please dun toy with feelings... cos it makes the heart sheds blood...

Happy or sad?

2008-08-23T10:29:00.000-07:00

Hahaha... i drank again... it was e sec time this week... is it a happy thing or sad thing???

What is love to you??? ... ...

Enjoying Life...

2008-08-22T06:10:00.000-07:00

First day in this year to feel so "shiok" without waking up by an alarm... woke up in e afternoon cos slept quite late after drinking the beer last night... met babie for a movie at 2.30pm... 12 Lotus... Singapore movie... worth it or not doesnt matter cos the ticket is free... we got it from the stomp aids event:) so, i think we use it wisely for our date hehehe....

After movie... shopped a bit... again... hehhe... bought a pink spaghetti top with colourful pocker dots... so sweet... i'm sure i will look even sweeter in it... i tell myself as i looked at myself in the mirror, " you are so beautiful!".... hehehe.. so mcm faham...

Woohoo!!! Jus got to know tt my team and i scored an "A" for our Marketing Research project! YESH!!! so happy... perhaps we chose the right topic that is juicy enough for Mr Lee to pay attention to hehehe... btw, thanks to all those frens who did the pre-marital sex surveys for mi!:) know that it's weird and personal... but, thanks a million!!!:)

Ok... wad's tml??? wahwah... now suddenly so different... seems like there will be new plans and surprises every single day... so free hahaha.... must make full use of it man... anyone, feel free to date mi hehe....

Holidays here I am!!!

2008-08-21T12:05:00.000-07:00

Yeahyeah!!! Brand Management finished liao... holidays are waving "HI" to mi... I kept laughing to myself even before the last paper... i was so desperate for holidays to come!!! and finally exams marks an end and holidays started at e beginning....:)

Went to Toa Payoh straight after the exams... had lunch together with Lina, HuiQi and Daphne... ah... someone so rude, din meet us up cos she need to provide tender loving care to her "Paul"... down her PE in next sem hahhahaha.... Gosh! We saw a gorgeous man in green with a black beanie! it's Qi Yu Wu... the guy from the 811 film n 12 lotus film!!! HuiQi, Daph and mi kept trying to turn back n glance at him for a few times... i realised we so humsup haha... he's really gorgeous.. but alone eating noodles and yong tau foo... well, he should be a treat to release our stress after exams hahaha....

Bought a little hello kitty bottle to remind myself to drink more water... cos lately i have very dry , chapped lips... maybe stress over exams ba... yup, and bought 2 pieces of "bra bra black sheep"... not black this time... but one pink and one orange... hehehe.... so contented cos this time i bought things for a need with a watchful budget... good job! a pat on the back!!!

At night, went to Bugis for steamboat... two types of soup stock... chicken and tomyam... dint really like tomyam one cos like a bit too oily... i prefer the chicken stock one... more healthier and i can eat with a peaceful mindset that it's not gonna be so unhealthy... i have to watch out on not to eat too spicy food, if not i have to go back to my doctor again... i dun want...
"burp!" so full after tat few hours at the steamboat table... my phrase for today, " Steamboat is never clean!" hahahahahaha...........................................................

After steamboat, went to buy Carlsberg... hehehe... nottie nottie mi right... but i was not drunk... jus bought it to drink near One Fullerton... brought mi back to so much memories.... sat there, walk there, the same place... enjoy the same breeze... but a different feeling... cos the one who brought mi there last time will no longer be bringing mi there ever again... i wanna go there... cos i dun wanna avoid the feelings... i wanna face the pain... and hopefully my next one would be better and bring mi there to give mi good memories...:) i'm still waiting patiently...:)

Wow, 1am in the morning... daddy came to fetch mi home...thank you daddy... reached home with a red face... mum was waiting for mi, she fell asleep... last day of exams passed by so fast... tml's plans for first day of holidays: movie with Babie!!! yesyes!!! time to sleep!!!

One last paper left!!! Plans??? hehe...

2008-08-19T07:40:00.000-07:00

Phew! Finally, Consumer Behaviour, the "intuition and cognitive" module and Marketing Research, the "reading from ppt slides" module papers done!!

Left the very last lap, Brand Management... how can we give up on this module? better not disappointment our best ever pem, Mike Cheong from New Creation... a veri good father and very good lecturer cum tutor who never complains anything and respects everyone for their hardwork and contribution of ideas... even though sometimes we suck at it hahaha...

Ok, decided to take a rest tonight and die at home tml the whole day to remain as a bookworm for the veri last time in this sem... hehe... after the paper, i shall break my cocoon and fly like a butterfly!!! YES!!! cant wait for this day to happen!! Thursday... i'm coming!!!

Hmmm... sent out my resume... still hoping for a reply from Wild Wild Wet or perhaps a job recommendation from Success... currently i'm kinda jobless... money money???

Plans? Maybe going to Malaysia in Sep or Oct... And Yup, should be traveling to Thailand in November... Well, maybe its a good time to let go of myself n leave Singapore for a while... Saving up hard for the air ticket... Hmm, thinking of M'sia... need someone to guide us around... Plannings with huiqi and daphne... who can be our tour guide??? sigh...

Something's wrong...

2008-08-16T08:51:00.000-07:00

Jus came back from dance prac.. tml will be the actual! i cant wait for it to happen!!

But, I think something's not right... to my right thigh muscle... it's an old injury... happened when i did front splits last time in dance studio... ouch! cant really kick high now... is the muscle sick?? almost all dancers have injuries... old injuries... yeah.. babie's left leg i think? mine... last time was the lower back sprain.. almost slip disk... it strike mi twice... now is right thigh muscle.. the last time tt strike mi was like one n a half year ago i suppose??? gosh... tml's dancing, god... please heal mi... keep me in your arms... i wanna put my best to you... i almost cried when i shared my composed song... jus now, my thoughts of the past were running... i couldnt stop it... but i know that He is here... yes, He cleansed my sins... thank you lord...

Sometimes, it's really hard to control your thinkings... esp the sad ones and temptations tht u have once tried before... well, He knows... but i will always rem wad yenyee daoshi had said... pray to God and He will listen. everyone has their needs. be patient. and perhaps should try what vincent has said... put the bible in front of you... but kinda fearful... isnt it?? i choose to pray ba...

People... Pray... He listens...

Down with one paper... 3 more to go!!!

2008-08-14T05:21:00.000-07:00

Oh yes... finally did my Human Resource Management and Practices paper today... 50% weightage... but, i'm confident for this paper...:) Glad tt it's over... then can better focus on other modules...

Kinda tired, looked through my schedule for this week... basically is study and dance practices... this week burnt again.. but i really must have proper time management.. next paper on monday 4-5.30pm, Consumer Behaviour.. no mood for tt... keep recalling of tt Erica Fong and her "cognitive" and "intuition"... gosh... talking like her... yep, she look like a hk star...dunno e name... God, please help mi!! ok, here it comes... this conversation hahah...

Nadia:"Do you believe in the existence of God?"

Mi: " Yeah... in the last 15 mins..." [wink*]

To be true... relying on God is good... but we ourselves have to try our best esp in exams... dun be too holy and say God will help you... U never know, perhaps God wants you to fall down and learn to get up again... tht's a trial... not a temptation... i rem i learnt this trial and temptation thing like two years back when qingnians had a bible study together with those English notes tt Zhiming or Zhiwei has prepared... Jo, can u recall??? is it from the book of Job, or Jacob???

k... getting more tired now... with this small screen lappie... they start to name mi as "miss small lappie" now... hehe... thanks ar...

Alright frens.... jiayou for the exams!! for those starting tml... like sheena, jasmine, clement, yvonne and "Bestie" (shy person dun wish to be identified hahah)... yups, and everyone who's taking exams... all e best!!!

My Favourite Babie!!!

2008-08-09T20:08:00.001-07:00

For your information!!
He's my love hehe... isnt he cute???a veri gentle babie boy...
Name: Myles. Nick: Maomao.
DOB: 20th Oct 2006.
My DOB: 20th Oct 1988.
Tht's e reason why i find him so special... same birthday haha...
Finally he smiled to mi cos i gave him a sip of milo hehe...
Babie Daphy, you will still be my no. 1 in Nyp ok?...hehe

Music Ministry Retreat!

2008-08-09T19:35:00.000-07:00

Whoo.... it was a LONG LONG day with my fellow music ministry yesterday... met them at 8am in church and we head off to NTU Alumni Club for our workshop/activities/training.. dunno how to say.. but all i could say tht it is fruitful! too bad i lose the chance to watch NDP la.. come on Singaporean! ai ya... forget it... every year have one...hehe...

i learnt so much especially in guitaring...hmm... zhiwei taught the #, 7, 9, maj, min, dim, b(flat), #7... wow wow wow... i think i am sotong in it...yeah, the hairstyle suits mi haha... k, tt's the beginning... i hope i can be a good guitarist.. zhihui jie and lanxiang jie keep on giving mi encouragement...thank you!!!:) yup, and xiaoling jie... she will never stop talking to mi about dance... "i love to see you dancing. you gave me the jazzy feel. u have the shape! God's blessings to you... Remind yourself to ask God how should you express out your dance piece!" Gosh! i'm floating! almost hitting the lamp post la hahaha... tt's veri good compliment... but most importantly, will rem her last sentence!:) besides the training, i could still rem the continuous meals haha... breakfast, buffet lunch, fish n chips for dinner(at 8th degree restaurant)... whoah! eat but i'm not hungry.. rev huang and his wife, uncle zhengwei and lunzhou laoshi had a double date at the square table for the dinner.. so cute la.. their table made the most noise kekeke.. can rem rev huang's laughter "HAHAHAHA"!!! ... ... ...

Cant believe it... i went back with the rest in the bus back to church cos i wanna go home study for my exams... but... my mp3 accompanied mi along the journey back... the songs remind mi of the past... then i suddenly slept and dreamt of the good memories... well, memories are the only things left for mi to think about.. perhaps i should try to get these good memories off my back yeah??? ha. no use thinking... reached back to church after a while... say goodbye to them and headed home..it was about 8pm... i said hi to mom at the door and went to bed... i haven even changed la... and i slept til this morning 9 plus...wow, i slept for almost half a day... heh! haven study yet, and exams starting on thur... good luck girl!

Alright, time to get serious a bit... later still meeting limei laoshi at 4pm to show her the solo dance for next sun... god, pls be with mi!!!

My new hairstyle!

2008-08-06T01:52:00.000-07:00

Went to AMK for a haircut today! it was... erm... hard to explain... a brand new look... yup, frenz... you will know it when u see mi heheh... i think i look funny, like jap... my sister said i look quite lian...my brother said i look like jelly fish... ok.. many comments... hairstylist was a guy!... young guy! hehehe...the way he brushes his fingers in between my hair... oh gosh! stop itt girl! back to earth!!! hahah... he recommended mi to style my hair so tt there's some volume to it... ok.. bought a loreal hair volume mousse... hopefully it helps!!:)

Have a great day!!!

Updates on NAPFA Day

2008-08-04T01:22:00.001-07:00

i love this pic... so healthy... but we are not... heheh