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Thursday, January 3, 2008
Singlehood Erased
He's back... And now I could see him. I'm glad to know he's back safely... all of a sudden, I'm back to being attached... 2 weeks attached, 2 weeks singlehood, and now, attached again ha...2 weeks ago, I told him how I felt... I didn't mean to think so much and make a fuss out of everything. it jus bothers me. partly cos my family problems doesn't give mi good impressions about guys. I didn't like it tat way. I'm a girl and I'm more to the conservative side although I may seem very open and extrovert to others. I just wanted to be respected in every way. I don't know what is in his mind as well... he jus seem to take it lightly. guys are so hard to understand. I know that guys have their pride and ego sight, but so do girls. we need to be protected and respected and loved. After he's back, I felt so happy for him... felt so happy that I could see him smile to me again. but, seems like he has forgotten what I have told him 2 weeks ago... he don't seem serious... and those that I didn't like was done again... i was blanked off n didn't know what to do at that time. so is he... hard to control... i am very disappointed, very sad... i know he loves me, and i love him too... jus some unacceptable actions that i didn't like at all. how i wish n hope that these can be erased from this relationship. I wanted to trust, but it's so hard... so hard to trust guys... if those actions are not there, i believe that the trust level will be positive. I didn't want to let him go, because he makes my life more happy. yes, happy... we have to be happy in life... that's wad he told mi... this will be the last chance that i'm giving him... ever again, i will let it go... though it's painful... but promises are broken... then i will have no choice... and I will remain unhappy...Came up with a mini score board for him, hoping to give him points here and there, so that trust level will go up. it may seem stupid(that's wad he said), but i rather find it meaningful to judge the RELATIONSHIP. This will be the last chance. I hope he wont disappoint and upset me again...R= RELIABILITYE= ECONOMICL= LOVEA= ADMIRATIONT= TENDERI= INITIATIVEO= ONLINESSN= NATURES= SHOULDERH= HUMBLEI= INTENTIONP=PASSIONdoes it make sense?
Angelic
