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Monday, March 24, 2008
Bible Verses that I learnt...
Jialing laoshi:

"Cast all your care upon Him for He cares for you." - 1 Peter 5:7

Audrey Loh (my best pal in GB 13th Coy'):

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." - Philippians 4:13

This morning I read my mini white bible on my way to work in the train. I read a bit of Philippians Chapter 4, as I wanted to understand more on Pure Thinking.

This is what it says,

8 "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy- meditate on these things.9 The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you."

Yes. I have to learn that pure thinking is important, as many such as lust is a sin, so is hatred. I may leave footprints to these few in the past that I have mentioned. But, I repent to God. I want pure thinking. It drives me to the path of peace with God.

Dear friends, if you need any help. I'm here. Just give me a simple tag into my cbox and I will try to help you by encouraging you with these precious Bible verses. Have a blessed day everyone...:)

~{7:40 PM}
Angelic

Sunday, March 23, 2008
Healing...
Sister Carolyn on leave again today... a bit of Monday blues for mi this morning but i am not late as usual! Helped out with Staff Nurse Lim in tidying up her files in her thumbdrive... she's soooo messy hahaha.... went online for a while and fingers itchy again, deliberately went to his flicker to view his beautiful pictures. well, i will still say that he has very good photography skills even though i dun love him and he is likewise. hmm, jus itchy hand and wanna view his flicker that's all. then realised that e photo of mi n him taken some time back was deleted. he must have junked it. i'm not sad at all. jus glad that he let go. singlehood life now is so wonderful... i went back to church and did so much to show God that He is the one that i truly love, the one that His love for mi will never change...:)

Come to think back, i think it is the right way to choose to end up with him, even though i love him so much. i wont want a partner who doesnt think about the future with mi and afraid of promises and not loving my family members... yes i know so well that i really love him so much that i ever thought of being his wife... but to him maybe it's jus a fairytale story that i always had in my own lalaland... he might think that it stupid... i always thought of the best for our future and moulding those imperfections into perfections... but, he jus didnt have the confidence in himself and is afraid that he cant take care of mi... well, if both of us dun work hard together, how to take care of each other and achieve a beautiful future? it takes two hands to clap u know? i jus learnt an analogy about a husband and a wife. husband on a chair and the wife on the ground. if the husband didnt pull and the wife didnt push herself up, how do the couple get onto the chair together? hmm, i think i'm the one standing on the chair instead-the husband. i'm trying my best to pull up my partner and get him up onto the chair with mi. but too bad that my partner chose to stay on the ground and didnt wanna see the beautiful scenery that's ahead of us... i have done my part, i'm not rejecting.

But, one important thing to point out is that, I will never look back to the past. I will let the bygones be the bygones. Few days after i broke up with him, my mum got a house... Finally God sees that I have made the right decision by listening to Him and in turn he blessed me with a house! :) If ever one day that he turn back to me, I will not be softened again and accept him. Because I dun wanna be hurt again, just like adding salt to the wound. I wanna heal. and yes, I am now... a guy from my church asked me out for a meal and he initiated to have a solo pic with me on Easter Day. I love God, and he love God too. We commit and serve the Lord our God willingly and looks into our future in God's hands. Hmm, not much about this guy for the time being... but i believed that God has His plans for me and bless me the right partner in my life...:)

I got a pressie today!!!

Time for lunch!!!

~{9:14 PM}
Angelic

Wednesday, March 19, 2008
a Bible verse
Genesis 1:2626Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.”

~{5:51 PM}
Angelic

Tuesday, March 11, 2008
This day has ended...
We are not meant to be together... different thinkings... different dreams... different wants... different attitudes... our hands are no longer interlocked... mobiles will no longer receive any messages from each other...no more pasta and picking up shells together by the beach... our minds will not be thinking of each other too... it's the end... had a past photo that we had... the only one during our most happy time... cant be uploaded... no more love... no more... only hatreds...

~{1:15 AM}
Angelic

Wednesday, March 5, 2008
jus leave mi alone...
Sister Carolyn is on mc today... but she've got mi lots of work to do today during her absence... i'm tired.. bothered and irritated...

work everyday from 8.30am to 6pm... to the hell of mi being a secretary to do lots of shit jobs... forget it, it's part of learning...

moving out soon... dun ask mi to where... i dun have the answer myself too... the landlords are chasing us out of their house... most prob can stay til end of april... sis' wedding is during mid june... will we be able to get a house in these few months with the price that suits mum's affordability? i'm so desperated to move out! i dun wan to stay under people's roof.. i want a house of my own... i had enough of it... i'm stressed... thanks to the boy in the house who keeps complaining about us to his lousy and uneducated parents...driving us out like mad dogs...

my relationship with him isn't getting any better either... can i be happy? how? he keeps on saying that i'm irritating, making him feel stress... did he think in my shoes as well? why did i keep on reminding him not to do this n not to do that? becos he did'nt change... i'm really disappointed...i wasted so much tears on him but i dun think that he really feels what i'm feeling now... yes, he said i'm irritating... i am likewise feeling that he's irritating whenever he says that i'm irritating... i keep on reminding him, jus becos i'm hoping to see changes in him... in that if i see any progress i will feel happy in this relationship... we have different moods.. when i'm very into good mood and wants some time with him, he will turn me off and say that he wants to go home.. i felt as though he have no intentions to see mi at all... i was totally turned off. and when i'm immuned to the bad mood, he will try to changed the situation and turn it upside down, trying to make mi happy... he should have done it earlier, shouldn't he? it just can't be salvage... when i talked about breaking up, he also never intend to salvage it... "we'll break up if you want to"... i'm so tired about this... why can't he see the importance of this relationship? is this a game? i dun even care what's happening around me... i jus wanna be left alone... i need silence...my heart is so painful... i have to get back to work, so that i won't think about the unhappy times... i have to pray to God too... i hope He answers.

~{7:14 PM}
Angelic